[WillowTheWhisp]

Not sure what you mean there katex by "original process" but it is very important to me to retain in my surname the name of my first husband and father of my children, and importnt for hem to keep the surname of their father. Had I been divorced from him and then married Busman I would simply have taken Busman's name and the children may well have changed their name to his as well but when their father died he was still very much part of the family and very much loved by all. The girls will of course adopt their husband's names when they marry but until such time they retain their father's name and in my opinion rightly so because that is whose daughters they are.

It is probably more important to us as a Latter-day Saint family as we believe the family relationships continue for eternity so although they now have a stepfather they still have a father too.

I have LDS friends who have been divorced and who have taken the surname of the new husband on marrying, and whose children have taken the surname of the new step father but as I said divorce is a different situation to death.

Incidentally, there is legally absolutely nothing to stop anyone adopting any surname on marriage. It's only the fact that most organisations are used to the woman taking the man's name that anything other than that tends to confuse them. Once we'd got one organisation to accept and understand that it was perfectly legal the others took that as a precedent and followed suit.