[jambutty]

If memory serves me well cans containing fizzy drinks are constructed so that they remain intact if left in direct sunlight for several hours. So your cans were not fit for purpose. I mean how hot can it get in the boot of a car. 50 C max I should imagine.

My guess is that either the cans were made of thinner metal or were over-gassed and the combination of movement and heat caused the explosion. But as many people have pointed out when you buy a can to take home it will suffer movement and heat so the real culprit would be one or both of the two former suggestions. Thus Tesco has an obligation to accept liability and compensate you fully.

But there is an art to complaining.

Before you complain get the facts firmly committed to memory and if there are any documents or physical evidence have it to hand but do not let the other side take possession of any documents. Give them a copy. If you have to hand over an item, like your cans, get a signed receipt that describes EXACTLY what it is you are handing over. Your photos are OK as far as it goes but you need them to be signed by the recipient of the cans.

NEVER LOSE YOUR TEMPER. Always remain cold, calm and collected. Do not ask questions. Things like, “What do you expect me to do now?” It only invites answers that tend to get you off topic. Keep rigidly to the provable facts and don’t allow yourself to be dragged off topic. Do not threaten with comments like, “I’ll go to Trading Standards” although you might like to drop a hint like “I will exercise my remaining options.” It leaves them guessing what you will do next. A good general never tells the enemy what he is going to do next. He allows it to come as a surprise that could panic the enemy into conceding. If the person who you are complaining to does not or cannot resolve the issue to your satisfaction your reaction should be, “Get the person who has the authority to resolve this issue”. No senior manager would leave his post without leaving someone with full authority to act in his absence so they can’t put you off by saying that the senior manager is away.

If you still get no satisfaction locally write to the CEO of the company and furnish details of your complaint. It isn’t very likely that the CEO will actually read your letter but one of his minions will, which is just almost as good. If you can find out the names of the board of directors send them a copy. You never know they may be plotting to get rid of the CEO.

Add to your letter something like this:
“Is this how you expect your management to treat your customers who are the lifeblood of your business?”

5 years ago I found myself in need of a new washer/dryer so I went to Curry’s as they were having a sale. Also any washer more than £300 would be delivered free. I chose an Indesit for £310 and that’s when things started to go wrong.

They would not guarantee a delivery time other than sometime on xxxxxxx. No matter how I tried I could not pin them down to a morning or afternoon. In the end they said that I should ring the warehouse in Leeds. After much discussion I got them to ring Leeds from in store and hand the phone over to me. During the ensuing discussion when they still insisted that they couldn’t specify a time of the day they let it slip that they had a vacant spot on a particular afternoon. I got my delivery for that particular afternoon.

But it didn’t end there. The washer arrived early evening. After reading the manual, I unpacked it and fitted it into place. In went some washing, the dials were set and I went off to watch TV. After a couple of hours or so I opened the door to find the washing cold and wet. The drying heater was obviously duff.

Next day I rang Currys but then you could only get to their main office and not the store. They would pass on a message. Instead I went back to Currys got hold of a manager and told him that the washing machine was duff.
“We will send round an engineer to repair it.”
“No you won’t” I replied, “I don’t buy faulty goods. You will send someone round to take it away and replace it with a good one.”
“We can’t do that sir. We don’t have that model in stock. You bought the last one.”
“When will you have some more in stock?”
“We don’t know.”
“OK! I will accept a full refund. Here’s my credit card.”
“We have to inspect the faulty machine to verify that it is faulty before we can offer a replacement.”
“I don’t want a replacement I want a full refund.”
“We have to inspect the faulty machine to verify that it is faulty before we can offer a refund.”
When can it be collected?”
“Next Thursday.”
“Morning or afternoon?”
“We cannot say. It will be some time on Thursday.”
Intense feeling of de ja vous. After much discussion where I might add that though I was boiling inside I was as cool as a cucumber on the outside we arrived at a morning collection.
Come the morning of collection a guy declared, “I’ve come to mend your washer”
“Oh no you haven’t. You’ve come to verify that it is duff.”
Much discussion and a lengthy phone call to his boss and he left a document declaring that he had inspected the machine and the drying heater was faulty and took the machine away.
Next day back to Currys clutching the chit. The manager that I spoke with the previous day looked me straight in the eye and walked past me. Rather fast I thought. So I collared another floor manager and explained the situation to her. She must have been privy to what had gone on before because she took one look at my stern face, asked for my credit card and made the refund.

I should just add that before leaving for Currys this final time I have made myself a tabard out of an old sheet with CURRYS HAVE ROBBED ME in large black letters on the back and something similar on the front. The idea being that if I got any more delaying tactics from them I would put the tabard on and wander around the store until something happened.

Shame they paid up so easily in the end. I was really in the mood for a major confrontation.

The moral of the story – stick to your guns come hell or high water.