[Alvin the chipmunk]

After spending so much time observing the s***e that's on offer at E-dud and Turd Moor, Bum-ley and Cackburn fans feel the need to watch decent football in order to regain mental sanity. That's why they come to our hallowed ground.

I see us not as a little brother, but as a role model to these two clubs, showing them the way the game should be played.