Accrington Web - 2019/20 Prediction League; Game 11 v Southend Utd (away)

Southend United

Accrington Stanley

2019/20 Prediction League; Game 11 v Sarfend (away)

“There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics” ............... cited oft-times by Mark Twain, who attributed it to Benjamin Disraeli (neither of whom, I imagine, would have expected to appear in the opening post of the Accrington Stanley Prediction League thread for game 11 of the 2019/20 season – especially since Disraeli died on 19th April 1888, and Twain on 21st April 1910) .............. the attribution is probably wrong anyway, since the phrase appears nowhere in any of Disraeli’s writings, and first began to circulate some years after his death

However; stats are interesting things. You’ll all know that we’re currently 19th in League One, with one win, 4 draws and four defeats, but that we’ve only lost once in our last six games in all competitions blah blah .............. You might perhaps think that it’s a lack of goals that has us anchored to the seabed on a short chain with no oxygen tanks, but it isn’t, because we’ve scored in all but two of our League games (and, academically, in the two cup/trophy games as well) ................ Our problem is that we can’t – to save our lives - convert a winning position in a League game into an actual win!

We were 2-0 up against the Shrews (pointy-nosed furry things), conceded three in the last 13 minutes and got nowt; we were behind against the PhoneyWombles, but got two and won ............. and we’ve led in each of our last four League games (2-1 against Brizzle, and 1-0 against Slumberland, Willy Wonka’s Wanderers and Blackpool) but came away, instead of four wins, with three draws and a defeat ................... IF we’d held on to our lead in every game where we’ve scored first or led, we’d now have 19 points not 7, and be in fourth place not 19th ............... and those 12 points that we’ve squandered could be very costly indeed!

Lies? No. Damned lies? No. Statistics? Yes. Our own fault? Abso-blooming-lutely ...................... And three red cards won’t have helped ............... KEEP ELEVEN MEN ON THE PITCH! (twelve, if you can count on the Ref – or if the Ref can’t count!)

Southend have already lost 4-3 twice this season (at Wycombe and Shrewsbury), 4-0 once (at Lincoln), 3-0 (at home to Rochdoodle), and 3-1 (at home to Blackpool), plus they shipped 3 in a 1.5 Desmond at home to Fleetwood; if you include the EFL Cup, they’ve conceded four there as well (1-4 ats MKDons); that’s nine (League) games, one win, one draw, seven defeats, drawn a blank four times, conceded either 3 or 4 six times, one clean sheet, scored 11 (which includes 3x3 goals as above), conceded 24 (for a GD of -13, second only to Bolton) and no manager .............. although there are rumours that they’re looking to appoint Henrik Larsson (4/9 favourite, having previously managed Helsingborg (twice – most recently from 16th June 2019 to 23rd August), Falkenbergs and Landskrona BoIS) ....... second favourites are Adam Barrett (no, nor have I), Sol Campbell, Phil Parkinson or current caretaker manager Gary Waddock – all at 20-1 – plus anybody who’s ever managed a football team and has still got a pulse ..............Larsson might be a decent choice if their game plan is going to be “We’re gonna score one more than you” – (All together) ...................

“Me and me Mam and me Dad and me Gran,
We’re going to Waterloo,
Me and me Mam and me Dad and me Gran,
And a bucket of vindaloo
Na na na
Na na na
Na na na na na na
Na na”

............. that is, of course, assuming that their latest Winding –Up petition, issued by HM Revenue and Customs for allegedly unpaid tax and their second this year, due for hearing on 16th October, doesn’t GreasyPole them first!

“Southend” came, it seems, from “South End” (of Prittlewell) ......... thanks to Queen Caroline’s visit in the 19th Century (you remember I told you this before?) it became a popular seaside resort, but that faded in the 1960s with the advent of cheap package foreign holidays; word is that with the Demise of Thos Cook’s the town Council is hoping that the crowds will once again come flocking to the shingle and brown water which is (are?) Southend Beach (or has it actually got a Blue Flag?); but you can at least get home from Southend (97 bus to Chelmsford, change there for all parts Northern)

They’ve been in League One since 2014/15 (this time round); they were formed in May 1906, apparently at the Blue Boar Pub, and joined the League in 1920; the height of their more recent achievements was the year they had in the Championship from 2005/06 (having won promotion through the play-offs the previous season), when they won League One with 82 points, 3 ahead of Colchester and 10 ahead of 5th-placed Barnsley, who beat Swansea 4-3 on pens after a Desmond in the Play-off Final; sadly 2006/07 saw them relegated to League One again, with 42 points (seven from safety), and 2009/10 saw them Greasy Pole to League Two in 23rd place with 43 points, 18 better than Stockport County, who went down as bottom team, with just 5 wins, 25 points, and a GD of -60; The Shrimpers also reached the Johnstone Paints Trophy (as it was then ) Final in 2012/23, losing 2-0 to Crewe (who are flying a bit at the moment!)

They Diced with Death last season, hitting the relegation spots three matches from the end of the season, being right in the mix on the final day, and staying up because of other results, and because they beat Sunderland 2-1 at home in their last game of the season; they were still only saved by GD, Plymouth going down with 50 points and -24, the Wombles staying up with 50 points an -21, and Sarfend having 50 points as well, but a GD of -13; they beat us 3-0 at theirs, and drew 1-1 at ours (Dan Barlaser getting the equaliser); of their last 18 games they won 2, drew 6, and lost 10 ........... Chris Powell was terminated as manager on 26th June; Kevin Bond came in on 2nd April and went out, falling on his sword, on 6th September; Bond’s overall record in the League during his brief tenure was W2 D2 L2 at the end of 2018/19, and L6 this season, so you can kind of understand why he went ...... twelve of the squad left in the summer – seven to Free Agent. One signed for Dartford (collecting tolls on the Tunnel, I suppose, and LB Ben Coker moved to Lincoln (whose season started with 3 wins and a record of 8 scored and 0 conceded, but then went downhill to the point where their next seven games yielded one win, one draw and five defeats, including a 6-0 home thrashing by Oxford in the presence of their new manager Michael Appleton (who has the oddest managerial history I can think of, stability-wise) ...........of the rest, LB Stephen Hendrie – who started out at Hamilton Accies – joined Kilmarnock, Dan Humphreys went to Canvey Island (day trip), and CMF Dru Yearwood joined Brentford ............... Seven came in, including striker Brandon Goodship (not to be confused with the Good Ship Brandon) from Weymouth, DMF Mark Milligan from Hibs, CB Richard Taylor from Burnley, two other Scots, and LB/LW Andre Blackman, who’s played all over the place (twelve clubs) including three games at Maghreb Association Sportive de Fès (Arabic: المغرب الرياضي الفاسي‎), who play in Morocco

Currently they’re 21st, with 4 points; the Wombles have 3, and Bolton need to win nine more to have nil.......... Form team is Ipswich with 13 points from their last five games (James Norwood has five of their 16 goals and Kayden has 4); next in line are Coventry on 11, Fleetwood, Doncaster and Posh have 10 ............. Bottom up (as it were) it’s Bolton and the Wombles (2), Pompey (3) Rochdale (5) and Accie, Tranmere, Burton, Rotherham and the Dons (6)

Famous managers include Bob Jack, who played for PNE, Bolton, Glossop and Plymouth, and who, when he retired, managed the Argyle for 28 years (1910 -1938); Bobby Moore managed there (84 – 86), as did David Webb, Peter Taylor, Arthur Rowley, Ronnie Whelan and Barry Fry; players you’ll have heard of include Freddie Eastwood, Britt Assombalonga, Lee Barnard, Barry Corr, Nathan Jones (as in, current manager of Stoke City – but for how long?), Chris Powell and Stan Collymore. Their biggest win was 10-1 against Golders Green in the FA Cup in 1934/35; leading goal scorer is Roy Hollis, who scored 135 between 1954 and 1960 and is, oddly, a member of the Norwich City Hall of Fame (“oddly” because he only played 96 games for the Canaries, although he did score 52 times); Alan Moody holds their appearance record with 506 from 1972 – 1984; their ground at Roots Hall was opened – only part-finished – in 1955 by Sir Stanley Rous (who remembers him?), and it remained the “newest” ground in the FL for 33 years, until Glandford Park was opened .............. thought you’d like to know

Deadline for entries is, as always, scheduled kick-off time, which is 3.00pm on Saturday 28th September. Their leading scorers are Stephen Humphrys with 5 and Charlie Kelman with 3; ours are Colby Bishop with four and Dion Charles with 3 .............. we’re sitting on a record of 1 win, 4 draws and four losses, they’re on one win, one draw and seven losses ....... and each of us has beaten MK Dons. We’ve scored 11 and conceded 17; they’ve scored 11 as well, but conceded 24 ............... and we owe them for last season .............. and we owe it to ourselves to start converting winning positions into points on the board; how about we start with this game?

Good luck to everyone! .............. Keep the Faith! ................ And thanks for playing!

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