Hitting a women

[Margaret Pilkington]

Oh, he feels the wrath alright, but not in blows....I use hot tongue and cold shoulder.....not that either have much impact after 47+ years.

[Accyexplorer]

Originally Posted by Margaret Pilkington

Oh, he feels the wrath alright, but not in blows....I use hot tongue and cold shoulder.....not that either have much impact after 47+ years.

Owww " hot tongue and and cold shoulder" I know them well

It may feel like we're going round in circles (different questions,same answers) but I'm trying to get a comprehension of it all and as you know I like to be educated, so here are a couple more questions

1. If a women hits a man in a certain spot (genitalia) they say it's the equivalent of a steam train hitting a rabbit .
So would, in your opinion and in that circumstance, a open handed slap be justifiable or would you still see the violence as "a no no" ?

2.If a person (for the purpose of topic we'll say a women) is coming at you with a knife,broken bottle etc and you fear for your life, is force justifiable, even if that "force" includes a (preemptive) strike?

3.Do you think "never hit a woman" unless you're in a situation that the woman can/will cause you severe injuries is fair?
I mean if she's fighting like one of Eric's squirrels then a "open handed slap" or "punch to the face" is a "no no", but if she's coming at you with a broken bottle does the phrase " 'NEVER' hit a women" still stand?

[shillelagh]

why does domestic abuse have to be fisticuffs ..... it can be mental abuse ...ie bullying you not a good father/mother ..... you cant cook for toffee ... etc ...

[cashman]

Originally Posted by shillelagh

it can be mental abuse ...ie bullying you not a good father/mother ..... you cant cook for toffee ... etc ...

Ive known a few that thats correct, should people tell lies?

[Accyexplorer]

Originally Posted by shillelagh

why does domestic abuse have to be fisticuffs ..... it can be mental abuse ...ie bullying you not a good father/mother ..... you cant cook for toffee ... etc ...

It doesn't,I think it was Margret who pointed out (around post No18) there is quite a bit of "domestic abuse" that doesn't involve "fisticuffs" and that this form of abuse often has more serious consequences.

[Studio25]

Originally Posted by Margaret Pilkington

Well said Cashy.
If there is any possibility of a risk with videos/video games.....and you are a parent, why would you take that risk?
Isn't it better to err on the side of caution?
I know what my answer to that question is.

I was brought up on a diet of Tom & Jerry, The Young Ones etc. My firsthand experience is that seeing fake violence does not turn a child into a violent adult. You can make statistics say anything you want - Less is right, there are far more factors than just playing 18-rated games or watching video nasties, it's just as conceivable that the same factors that turn a kid into an unhinged adult are the same factors that allow him to play those games or watch those videos.

I actually think that computer games should be part of a child's upbringing. The disruption caused by this kid shows he's mentally unhinged and if it were possible to identify him, he'd be a prime candidate for some sort of therapy before he murders a class full of kids in a few years.

I just told my teenage son what you said about denying access to games and films because of the risk it might turn him into a violent person. His response was that I should take him to school tomorrow because of the risk of crossing four roads turning him into a red stain on the front of someone's car...

[DaveinGermany]

Originally Posted by Studio25

His response was that I should take him to school tomorrow because of the risk of crossing four roads turning him into a red stain on the front of someone's car...

Proper little smartarse, think you should give him a slap!

[Margaret Pilkington]

Originally Posted by Studio25

I was brought up on a diet of Tom & Jerry, The Young Ones etc. My firsthand experience is that seeing fake violence does not turn a child into a violent adult. You can make statistics say anything you want - Less is right, there are far more factors than just playing 18-rated games or watching video nasties, it's just as conceivable that the same factors that turn a kid into an unhinged adult are the same factors that allow him to play those games or watch those videos.

I actually think that computer games should be part of a child's upbringing. The disruption caused by this kid shows he's mentally unhinged and if it were possible to identify him, he'd be a prime candidate for some sort of therapy before he murders a class full of kids in a few years.

I just told my teenage son what you said about denying access to games and films because of the risk it might turn him into a violent person. His response was that I should take him to school tomorrow because of the risk of crossing four roads turning him into a red stain on the front of someone's car...

I also watched cartoons as a child....but this was much before the time of The Young Ones.
I also have a healthy scepticism of statistics.
There has been lots of research on the effects of violent video games and there is evidence of changes within the brain of children after relatively short periods of time.

If as a responsible parent, you choose to let your teenage son play these kind of games, then of course that is your prerogative.

Maybe some computer games are suitable for children, and there are some which will help with problem solving and hand-eye co-ordination.....but the games should be age appropriate and they should be monitored by parents for their suitability. I was not saying that children should not play computer games....just that violent games...those blood and guts ones, the ones which glorify rape and gang violence are not appropriate.
Life is full of hazards. We all do the best we can to minimise the risks to our children.

[Accyexplorer]

IMHO like anything else, "gaming" as they call it should be enjoyed in moderation, balanced with other activities,family time,schoolwork etc.
Regarding concerns about aggression, I think quite early on kids tend learn to distinguish between fantasy and reality, and their brains don’t treat these phenomena the same.
That being said I can see how some kids could turn out a little more violent after being exposed to violent video games, especially if there's no balance in the form of other activities.

Perhaps the parents of the children that are allowed to play said games, all day everyday the ones that don't give their kids a good balance of activities need a good slap

[Margaret Pilkington]

I also think your sons analogy is flawed. Presumably he has been doing the journey to school in the past and has learned the safety rules......and is quite capable of ensuring his safety.( though any one of us could suffer the fate of being mown down by an out of control vehicle)
And of course he doesn't want to be deprived of his computer games.....children who have had such privileges are reluctant to give them up.

[Margaret Pilkington]

Again this is a major thread wander.
We will be getting our hands slapped very soon and will be made to sit on the naughty step.

[Eric]

Here's another sort of wander. What really pees me off is men saying, "I don't hit women." You're not supposed to you dumb mother. You want credit for it? A cookie? A gold star? Jeesh. Soldiers don't get the VC for doing their duty. Don't preen yourself, and proudly claim a right to bask in the admiration of your fellow humans.

End of rant

[Accyexplorer]

Originally Posted by Eric

Here's another sort of wander. What really pees me off is men saying, "I don't hit women." You're not supposed to you dumb mother. You want credit for it? A cookie? A gold star? Jeesh. Soldiers don't get the VC for doing their duty. Don't preen yourself, and proudly claim a right to bask in the admiration of your fellow humans.

End of rant

Very true, it's similar to those parents that appear on 'talk shows' like Jeremy Kyle saying things like "I look after my child", "I pay my child support"....

...walks of whistling Dion-di-mucci's the-wanderer

[Lucysgirl]

AccyExplorer said: << ...For example, A (abusive) woman takes a knife to attack her partner (regardless of size) The women clearly has the upper hand in this situation, so why shouldn't the partner defend himself (with force if necessary)?>>

The first thing is to keep calm and speak in a lowered tone of voice to try to diffuse the situation and keep talking. She's probably right handed. If she tries lunging at you do what boxers do, feint to the left, then feint to the right and during that last move, quickly lift up your straightened left arm - aiming it at the inside of her right arm and keep swining your straight arm outwards away from your two bodies. The surprise factor and weight of your swinging straight arm should force her right arm (& thus the knife) away from you ........... then scarper.

[Margaret Pilkington]

See, Accyexplorer...it is brave to run away.