what age should a child be left in on their own?? - Page 2

WillowTheWhisp · 09-05-2007, 19:31

Yes some are far more immature than others.

katex · 09-05-2007, 19:41

Agree, have got to know your own child, but would not myself have left even a 13-year old, only because of the child I was at that age.

My gran lived with us until she died when I was thirteen. My mum and dad wanted to go to my Aunt and Uncles up Burnley Road near Huncoat. Was quite happy to let me be on my own ... an adventure I thought.

Took myself off to bed,but was not the human variety or thoughts of fire that scared me, just that my imagination ran riot and started thinking of goolies, spooks, you name it. Got myself dressed and walked all the way up to my Aunts. Will not forget the look on my mum's face as she saw me at the door, and how she must have been embarassed about what my Aunt was thinking.

Even later in life at 18 .. brother taken himself off to Cambridge, and at last got the backroom to myself (always slept in the same room as my parents.. 2 up/2down). One night very windy and could have sworn someone knocked on the closet door .. never went back in that room again.

So you see, not always about Human dangers, a young mind can be scared of other elements.

Margaret Pilkington · 09-05-2007, 19:43

From the age of 11 I was responsible for my three younger brothers. I used to get them ready for school in a morning.....and take the youngest to the child minder. I also had chores to do in the home. I know I felt very grown up.....and believe I was very sensible. I have always felt that these responsibilities, given to me by my parents because they trusted me, made me the person I am today.
I do not think you can generalise about what is the right age to leave a child....you have to know the maturity and the capapbilities of the child before you make such a decision.

harwood red · 09-05-2007, 19:44

Quote:

Originally Posted by Neil

You need to have them at home so they can carry you up the stairs and dump you on your bed when you get in

No I tend to get phone calls half way through the night asking me what time they should expect me home!!!!!

In fact after stanley match at clitheroe on monday I dropped some people off back at oaklea and was dragged into the pub against my will

and then got a phone call from my eldest asking me where I was and did I know what time it was!!!!

So I think in this household there is a bit of role reversal going on...just wish they did all washing and ironing too

lancsdave · 09-05-2007, 19:46

Quote:

Originally Posted by Margaret Pilkington

From the age of 11 I was responsible for my three younger brothers. I used to get them ready for school in a morning.....and take the youngest to the child minder. I also had chores to do in the home. I know I felt very grown up.....and believe I was very sensible. I have always felt that these responsibilities, given to me by my parents because they trusted me, made me the person I am today.
I do not think you can generalise about what is the right age to leave a child....you have to know the maturity and the capapbilities of the child before you make such a decision.

When I was 12 I used to be kept off school to look after my several month old brother while my stepmother went to bingo........ cow

Margaret Pilkington · 09-05-2007, 19:48

I can also remember during the school summer holidays collecting pop bottles so that we could get the money to go on the bus to Whalley. I certainly would not be much older than 12. I made a picnic and we spent the day on the banks of the Ribble in Whalley...the boys fished for tiddlers and sticklebacks....I collected a large bunch of very stinky wild garlic flowers and we went home at teatime, having had a lovely adventurous day.......can you imagine the headlines today if a mother allowed her children to do such things.
It was all part of growing up and I would not have had it any other way.

Margaret Pilkington · 09-05-2007, 19:49

Quote:

Originally Posted by lancsdave

When I was 12 I used to be kept off school to look after my several month old brother while my stepmother went to bingo........ cow

I was very proud that my parents entrusted the care of my brothers to me....although sometimes they were a blooming imbuggerance.

Neil · 09-05-2007, 19:58

Quote:

Originally Posted by Margaret Pilkington

..I made a picnic and we spent the day on the banks of the Ribble in Whalley...the boys fished for tiddlers...

I am not trying to be awkward (for a change

), but the Ribble does not go through Whalley. The Calder does though.

Margaret Pilkington · 09-05-2007, 20:02

OK Neil....it wasn't the Ribble......but we had a picnic on the banks of whatever river it is that runs through Whalley. I never was any good at geography....even local stuff.

lancsdave · 09-05-2007, 20:13

Quote:

Originally Posted by Margaret Pilkington

I was very proud that my parents entrusted the care of my brothers to me....although sometimes they were a blooming imbuggerance.

Unfortunatley it wasn't that sort of environment I lived in. Fair to say if I was a child nowadays living under her roof she would be locked up.

katex · 09-05-2007, 20:16

Bin there, done that Margaret.

One thing I was always grateful for though, I was never a 'latch-key' child, always my mum/gran to greet me with a lovely meal at the end of a school day.

Would not ever have given my children/grandaughter the responsibilty of this title either, even when becoming a single parent when my son was 4 ... always made sure he had somewhere safe to go until I got home .. no choice but to earn a crust for them you see .. but the thought of them having to return from school to an empty house made my skin crawl. However, as in the thread that this has sprung from would not be judgemental of other people.

Margaret Pilkington · 09-05-2007, 20:22

Katex, both of my parents worked......there were 7 of us with me being the eldest......so work was a necessity if you wanted to eat....there was very little available in the way of benefits in those days.....I'm talking 1950's.
I always knew that cash was limited and that to do my share was important...it helped my parents to put bread on the table. We NEVER had holidays....there wasn't the money to do that......but we had a warm comfortable home...plenty of books, records and we played outside a lot. I didn't feel like a latch key child.
We also had good neihbours who would look out for us too.
It was a different kind of life.......but some of the things that we did, our parents would be severely censured for in todays climate.

katex · 09-05-2007, 20:28

Like I said Margaret .. not judgemental at all .. worked for your family then.. crumbs !! 7 children, eh ?

Yeh, think these days .. probably will be open to more criticism.

mallard · 09-05-2007, 20:33

Well i would not like to say my brother was baby sitting for some one at 15 year,s of age

SamF · 10-05-2007, 14:56

It completely depends on the person. I have been able to look after myself (to and from school, home alone etc) pretty much from the last year of primary school(16 now). I do know that this would have been too early for some but for me I would have been able to manage it earlier. Saying that I would be useless as a child minder and have no doubt that there are countless 13 year olds out there that would outshine me in an instant.