Judging a book by it's cover. - Page 7

Alan Varrechia · 26-08-2011, 18:46

I can just see them now, sat in the Railway, trouser legs rolled up giving themselves funny handshakes!!!!!!!

Mancie · 26-08-2011, 18:49

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alan Varrechia

I can just see them now, sat in the Railway, trouser legs rolled up giving themselves funny handshakes!!!!!!!

..would that be the smoking or non smoking section?

cashman · 26-08-2011, 19:38

Quote:

Originally Posted by garinda

I don't think anyone's been 'holier than thou'.

the comment wasn't aimed in your direction, as i thought yeh would know, following the other days natter,

but yer entitled to that opinion,i happen to think otherwise.

garinda · 26-08-2011, 19:43

Quote:

Originally Posted by cashman

the comment wasn't aimed in your direction, as i thought yeh would know, following the other days natter,

but yer entitled to that opinion,i happen to think otherwise.

I didn't take it, that you meant me.

I just disagreed with it.

I don't think anyone's been 'holier than thou'.

Not that I've seen evidence of anyway.

Margaret Pilkington · 26-08-2011, 20:42

Judging a book by its' cover.
When we buy a book..or borrow one for that matter, it is usual to read the synopsis, and the comments made by the critics....this is how we decide whether this particular book is going to be something we invest time in...and read. If the book cover looks boring, or the synopsis is lack lustre then we probably won't bother with it.....we have made the judgement.

We all judge books by their cover....and a forum members profile is all we can go on until we are fortunate enough to meet the member in person.
While I know there is nothing in the rules that says we have to be truthful, it is very different to put something that is calculated to mislead....and I appreciate that this doesn't give other members carte blanche to get on that persons case.

I never really gave creedence to the theory that the person being discussed in this thread was someone who already had a forum identity....and was just posting these mundane threads to wind people up.

The threads and posts on the forum, by this person, I found tedious(I eventually used the ignore button)....and made comment to that effect. I make no apology for that because it is how I would treat any other member of the forum.(I don't think I was ever nasty to this member - if I was, then I apologise for that) If you come on here as an adult then you should expect to be treated like an adult.

garinda · 26-08-2011, 21:02

Quote:

Originally Posted by Margaret Pilkington

...a forum members profile is all we can go on until we are fortunate enough to meet the member in person.

Being nosey I occasionally look at someone's profile.

Ninety percent of them contain little, or no information.

So all I have to go on, in deciding what someone is like, is from what they post.

Which in the case of the person concerned, may have been banal, but was never, ever nasty, or snide. Yet that's what they got back from many of us.

I'm sure there are lots of people on here I'll never meet in person. That doesn't mean I won't have an opinion about someone's character.

I loved Westender, and shared many happy interactions with her, but sadly never met her, and now of course I won't, because sadly she's passed away.

We do all form opinions about other people.

Sometimes we discover out inital opinion was right.

Other times they aren't.

Margaret Pilkington · 26-08-2011, 21:20

Yes, you are right.
Introductory posts help too.
The only reason I looked at this members profile was because the posts were so short, and seemed to have only one focus/ topic.

It is inevitable that we make judgements based on what we know.....or at least what we think we know....that is why so many people have been duped in internet friendships....because you can purport to be anything you want...whether it is true or not, well that is another matter entirely.

garinda · 26-08-2011, 21:36

Quote:

Originally Posted by Margaret Pilkington

internet...because you can purport to be anything you want

That's true, and without wishing to discuss another thread's topic, that isn't necessarily always a bad thing.

Everyone can have an equal voice. Especially on a forum such as this.

It doesn't matter whether in 'real life' you are shy, stutter, aren't very confident with language, or even if you can't communicate verbally at all.

You can say whatever you want. Be someone different.

You can have a voice, even if in reality you literally haven't got one.

I disagree with all this guff about proof of identity being needed, before what we post is taken seriously.

Even if we physically meet people, we all still self-edit what we want people to see, and know about us.

I suspect for most of us, there'll only be a very small number of people who'll know the 'real' person.

If any.

odders · 26-08-2011, 21:38

Quote:

Originally Posted by garinda

Being nosey I occasionally look at someone's profile.

As most regular members will...(Even if were not in the clique, and yes I did once mention it, silly me)

Quote:

Originally Posted by garinda

Ninety percent of them contain little, or no information.

Just like mine

Quote:

Originally Posted by garinda

So all I have to go on, in deciding what someone is like, is from what they post.

Just like all members

Quote:

Originally Posted by garinda

Which in the case of the person concerned, may have been banal, but was never, ever nasty, or snide. Yet that's what they got back from many of us.

Very true, but people made assumptions, on posts made usually in the past lacking substance(Troll like), also a profile that gave credibility.

Quote:

Originally Posted by garinda

I'm sure there are lots of people on here I'll never meet in person. That doesn't mean I won't have an opinion about someone's character.

Yes you will never meet me. And I honestly do not care of your opinion of me, or your opinions of other members. If I read a post it is of my choice, as it is if I reply, the whole point of an open forum, the ignore feature is available, yes just read it and don't reply

Quote:

Originally Posted by garinda

I loved Westender, and shared many happy interactions with her, but sadly never met her, and now of course I won't, because sadly she's passed away.

R.I.P , another sad loss.

odders · 26-08-2011, 21:41

Quote:

Originally Posted by garinda

That's true, and without wishing to discuss another thread's topic, that isn't necessarily always a bad thing.

Everyone can have an equal voice. Especially on a forum such as this.

It doesn't matter whether in 'real life' you are shy, stutter, aren't very confident with language, or even if you can't communicate verbally at all.

You can say whatever you want. Be someone different.

You can have a voice, even if in reality you literally haven't got one.

I disagree with all this guff about proof of identity being needed, before what we post is taken seriously.

Even if we physically meet people, we all still self-edit what we want people to see, and know about us.

I suspect for most of us, there'll only be a very small number of people who'll know the 'real' person.

If any.

Good post, and it goes back to the title of your thread.

garinda · 26-08-2011, 21:43

Quote:

Originally Posted by odders

As most regular members will...(Even if were not in the clique, and yes I did once mention it, silly me)

Just like mine

Just like all members

Very true, but people made assumptions, on posts made usually in the past lacking substance(Troll like), also a profile that gave credibility.

Yes you will never meet me. And I honestly do not care of your opinion of me, or your opinions of other members. If I read a post it is of my choice, as it is if I reply, the whole point of an open forum, the ignore feature is available, yes just read it and don't reply

R.I.P , another sad loss.

You're right about one thing.

We'll probably never meet.

I live overlooking ducks and geese in Patagonia.

odders · 26-08-2011, 21:49

The ducks loss. I got a stale loaf here...

garinda · 26-08-2011, 21:52

Quote:

Originally Posted by odders

I think 2, maybe you missed the last line.

I don't know what passes as humour on Blackburn Web, but over here it's what we like to hope is a joke.

Margaret Pilkington · 26-08-2011, 22:23

Quote:

Originally Posted by garinda

That's true, and without wishing to discuss another thread's topic, that isn't necessarily always a bad thing.

Everyone can have an equal voice. Especially on a forum such as this.

It doesn't matter whether in 'real life' you are shy, stutter, aren't very confident with language, or even if you can't communicate verbally at all.

You can say whatever you want. Be someone different.

You can have a voice, even if in reality you literally haven't got one.

I disagree with all this guff about proof of identity being needed, before what we post is taken seriously.

Even if we physically meet people, we all still self-edit what we want people to see, and know about us.

I suspect for most of us, there'll only be a very small number of people who'll know the 'real' person.

If any.

You are right. Isn't it something to do with the Johari Windows(no not Microsoft Windows)?
We have different persona's for whoever we are with.....only we ourselves know the true persona....and even this is very fluid...subject to change according to mood, experience, and phases of the moon.

odders · 27-08-2011, 09:22

Quote:

Originally Posted by garinda

I don't know what passes as humour on Blackburn Web, but over here it's what we like to hope is a joke.

Why quote an edited post? And not quote your own(unedited)?

As for Blackburn Web, I think what you read on here stops folk from posting or signing up there, mainly cause it is repeat posts. I only view the site(BW) as a guest, as it seems others do.

But fair game you have given more awareness to that website, so go an give them some traffic, call yourself "Queen Bee", and post your finest