Kids say the darndest things.

garinda · 31-10-2006, 16:30

Appologies if there is a similar thread somwhere, but I couldn't find it.

My seven year old nephew is still on half term. I looked after him yesterday, and Mum has had him today.

Whilst having our lunch together in Accrington, I asked Mum what she would like for her birthday. She said she didn't want anything, and then my nephew piped up, 'you can buy some cream for wrinkles, I've seen it on the telly.' Mum happily laughed, thus getting even more wrinkles I suppose!

He'd spent the morning watching a DVD of the film Elf. As we were leaving the cafe he whispered loudly 'look, it's an elf', about a very small man we had to squeeze past. Thankfully he didn't hear, but we were in stitches at his lack of tact, and had to explain how it was rude to call someone an elf, whilst trying to stiffle our giggles.

This is the same little diplomat who on Mother's Day last year, at a Sunday lunch in my Mum's honour, blurted out 'when you die Grandma we're going to use the money to buy a conservatory.' My brother choked on his roast pork, and swore that he had never said anything of the sort for him to over hear. Again my Mum has a great sense of humour, and it made her day.

Any other children's quips, that have made you squirm or laugh...or both?

accymel · 31-10-2006, 18:25

I will leave you my son for a day - you will have enough quotes to fill a book & if anyone will drop u in it my son certainly is the 1st usually....he's laugh a minute errr

katex · 31-10-2006, 19:22

Certainly not, my kids have been brought up proper like, and would never embarrass me in this way.

Don't you think though Garinda, that sometimes, they know exactly what they are saying, and do it for the 'laughometer' score ??

Gayle · 31-10-2006, 21:53

Think I've posted this before but when Maddie was younger we were in the pie shop and a rather largish chap was buying his lunch. The girl behind the counter said 'your pies' and handed him two bags with pies in. Maddie looked at him and just as he was passing us she said 'I bet he's going to eat both of them himself'.

WillowTheWhisp · 31-10-2006, 22:00

When my daughter was about 2 we were in Asda and my late husband went to the loo. She announced at the top of her voice "My Daddy's gone in there. He's probably having a poo!"

Tinkerbelle · 01-11-2006, 00:29

My son once answered a knock to the front door and shouted "Mum it's that big fat man again"

I was mortified!!!

SPUGGIE J · 01-11-2006, 00:32

A kids priority in life is to embaress thier parents as much and as often as possible. They laugh we become very red in the face and mortified at it yet because they are kids they get away with it (lucky so n so's)

jimmi5bellies · 01-11-2006, 10:06

Tip : Dont ever go topless abroad with teenage sons

, not when you have sons that start shouting out loud to everybody "Oh look, mums got her droopies out ! "

I could have curled up in a ball and withered away.

garinda · 01-11-2006, 10:43

Quote:

Originally Posted by jimmi5bellies

Tip : Dont ever go topless abroad with teenage sons

, not when you have sons that start shouting out loud to everybody "Oh look, mums got her droopies out ! "

I could have curled up in a ball and withered away.

When my Mum went topless in the south of France, my then fourteen year old brother disappeared sharpish, and we didn't see him for a fortnight.

It was brilliant.

jimmi5bellies · 01-11-2006, 13:41

Quote:

Originally Posted by garinda

When my Mum went topless in the south of France, my then fourteen year old brother disappeared sharpish, and we didn't see him for a fortnight.

It was brilliant.

lol, mind you he was the shy type

nikkival · 01-11-2006, 19:39

While we were on holiday this year, we were being nostalgic about children's TV and started talking about the Wombles - and were trying to remember the names, Madam Cholet, Great Uncle Bulgaria, Orinocco....to which my then 11 year old son said - weren't she married to John Lennon? The whole bar was in stitches laughing!

katex · 01-11-2006, 22:29

Quote:

Originally Posted by garinda

When my Mum went topless in the south of France, my then fourteen year old brother disappeared sharpish, and we didn't see him for a fortnight.

It was brilliant.

Should think he did too, Garinda !!.. think yer mum was the embarrassment .. I would never have embarrassed my son when he was 14 years old by going topless on a beach in front of him, when you would never dream of doing it in Oak Hill Park on a hot Summer's day in Accy, or even walking around your own living room !! Got me moral hat on tonight ... but there is a difference between adult >>children perimeters against adult >>>adult perimeters

junetta · 01-11-2006, 23:17

I remember when my daughter was around five years old, she had heard us talking about our neighbours. Calling in for coffee a couple of days later, my neighbour was still praising the new wallpaper in her lounge.

A little voice piped up "My Daddy says that's bloody awful"!!

Exit stage left.................

Debbie J · 01-11-2006, 23:19

My then 5 year old son and I were waiting for the free bus at Asda. Their was also an elderly lady.

My son kept staring at her, the lady just happened to move her hand, at which he piped up 'ooo your hands like your face, all wrinkled and crinkled'

The lady looked at him and said 'you'll be like me one day' quick as a flash my son quipped back 'hope I'm dead first'

I have never in all my life wanted the ground to open up and swallow me so much. To her credit the lady took it in good humour.

ANNE · 01-11-2006, 23:25

MUMMIBOO answered the door early one morning and said " If you want to see my Mum you can't till she's had a brew an a fag."
Then promptly shut the door.