Parenting classes - Page 2

Margaret Pilkington · 12-09-2008, 14:33

Quote:

Originally Posted by lancsdave

To my knowledge there are still no manuals on how to be the perfect parent, so how come people can be/feel qualified to give classes

I was going to say that too.
Every child is unique so it is hard to be a perfect parent.

This is where the extended family of years gone by came into its own.....aunties parents and grandparent used to compare notes, but even that wasn't perfect.
I think there are lots of pressures on parents today....the last one they really need is to be made to feel like they need lessons in bring up their children properly......I think if I had been confronted with an invite to something like that, I too would have felt affronted.

mrskitty · 12-09-2008, 14:43

What about those who feel to afraid to ask for help?This is a perfect opportunity for them.

Margaret Pilkington · 12-09-2008, 14:58

I can't understand being afraid to ask for help.......unless you are talking about practical help.
There are a whole load of places to get information from......I think that calling them Parenting Classes is a very negative way of dealing with something...if it were called a Parents Forum, or even Parents Club, then perhaps it would be seen in a better light.

polly · 12-09-2008, 15:01

It will be the same as parents nights, the ones who need to go will not do so, and the parents that do not need to go will

West Ender · 12-09-2008, 15:12

"Teaching how to be good parents......." it's very patronising isn't it? Now if the lady said it was a support group for parents and families, which is more what it sounds like, she might get more takers. As Margaret P rightly said the extended family, with all the support and help it often gave, isn't as prevalent these days. On top of that the general lack of discipline in the environment (not necessarily in the child's home) makes it more difficult for many parents to cope as well as they might.

The principle of the "classes" is sound, they could probably be beneficial and, not least, a way of getting to know other families. The advertising, however, needs to be a bit more inviting.

WillowTheWhisp · 12-09-2008, 15:27

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gayle

And surely, if someone was a 'bad' parent they wouldn't be likely to go to a parenting class in the first place would they?

I think you're probably right. I've always found that whenever we have arranged any 'classes' or similar that the only people who actually turn up are the ones who don't need to. Preaching to the converted.

jaysay · 12-09-2008, 16:25

Quote:

Originally Posted by WillowTheWhisp

I think you're probably right. I've always found that whenever we have arranged any 'classes' or similar that the only people who actually turn up are the ones who don't need to. Preaching to the converted.

Think your spot on there Willow, you don't see the parents of kids who are forever in trouble actually asking to be taught how to be better parents, they usually don't give a stuff, or or to occupied down the pub to care

emamum · 12-09-2008, 16:27

i think social services can refer parents to this course....... i think ussi is a social worker

Benipete · 12-09-2008, 18:19

Quote:

Originally Posted by jaysay

Think your spot on there Willow, you don't see the parents of kids who are forever in trouble actually asking to be taught how to be better parents, they usually don't give a stuff, or or to occupied down the pub to care

They could hold these classes in the Railway Pub 7 days a week

blazey · 12-09-2008, 19:13

Parenting classes aren't for bad parents, they are for parents who want to learn about new methods of caring for their children. Not everyone is a naturally fantastic parent with angelic children!

I think parenting classes are a good idea and can only bring parents and their children closer together so what is the harm?

polly · 12-09-2008, 19:14

Quote:

Originally Posted by emamum23

i think social services can refer parents to this course....... i think ussi is a social worker

The phrase 'you can take a horse to water, but you cant make it drink', springs to mind

Margaret Pilkington · 12-09-2008, 19:28

Quote:

Originally Posted by blazey

Parenting classes aren't for bad parents, they are for parents who want to learn about new methods of caring for their children. Not everyone is a naturally fantastic parent with angelic children!

I think parenting classes are a good idea and can only bring parents and their children closer together so what is the harm?

While you may feel that parenting classes are a good idea......and they may well be, but you have to get the parents who need the help to recognise that they DO need help.
And I'm not sure that parenting classes will necessarily bring parents and children closer together, if the closeness does not exist in the first place, I fail to see how parenting classes will facilitate it.

I think the very name Parenting Class is a barrier to the uptake of such a scheme...it could be promoted in a much less condescending and patronising way....and for it to be effective, it would have to be.

emamum · 12-09-2008, 19:36

Ive just found the leaflet thatcame from school....its says "Parent survival course"

WHAT IS THE PARENT SURVIVAL COURSE

The courseis aimed atparents atcarers who care full time for children between the ages of 2 and 8. It is based on theidea thta being a parent is hard work and most parents find it difficult to deal with their childs behaviour atsome point. We also know that some children are more difficult to manage than others. The course aims to help parents feel more confident in dealing with their child behaviour, without looking to find blame

The course aims to

help you bring out the best behaviour in your children
Build upon your skills and techniques for dealing with difficult behaviour
Provide supoort to families
Increase your self-confidence.

there will be chances to talk about your own experiences and practice new ideas and meet other parents who are having similar experiences and share ideas with each other,

Margaret Pilkington · 12-09-2008, 19:46

If that is what it is about, then I think it needs to be well advertised, and promoted differently.
I don't think that approaching parents in a nursery/school playground is the way to go....especially if the person promoting calls them 'parenting classes'.

I still think that most parents are savvy enough to seek out help if they are in difficulty....the ones who don't do this are the ones who would not attend such a course anyway.

Where is the funding coming from for such a venture? Does anyone know?

Lilly · 12-09-2008, 19:55

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gayle

A nursery school (that shall remain nameless) sent out flyers via all the children at my kids' school advertising Parenting Classes. A few days later a woman was in the school yard trying to encourage parents to go to these classes.

She came over to me - I asked her what it was all about. She said it was all about teaching us how to be better parents. At the time I was mid-cuddle with Maddie so I asked Maddie if I needed any lessons in parenting, she shook her head. I turned to the lady and told her that "no thanks" and "I found the whole thing very patronising".

Is it just me? And surely, if someone was a 'bad' parent they wouldn't be likely to go to a parenting class in the first place would they?

I think I know which nursery this was but I won't name them. One of my friends was telling me about these classes. They advise you how to speak to your children, how harsh tones can make children afraid, not to resort to shouting as after a while they children block you out, no smacking, they advise you on other ways of punishing bad behaviour.

I wouldn't pour scorn on anyone who attends these classes, they are only trying to do their best for their children.....however, like others have said, the people who really could do with these classes wouldn't dream of going as they never think they need help with parenting.