Parenting classes - Page 3

lancsdave · 12-09-2008, 19:56

Quote:

Originally Posted by blazey

Not everyone is a naturally fantastic parent with angelic children!

I must admit I might agree with you for the first time ever

However some try harder than others at it and when they need help will usually go about trying to get it.

If they are the people who the course is aimed at then maybe it becomes easier to find help. Perhaps it should be a compulsory course for all parents then those who do really need help won't be missed out, of course that assumes you don't need to be sober or drug free to turn up

lancsdave · 12-09-2008, 20:01

Quote:

Originally Posted by emamum23

The courseis aimed atparents atcarers who care full time for children between the ages of 2 and 8.

I know kids grow up quicker these days but does childhood end at 8 or do they become a lost cause if not trained by then

It seems to be badly worded.

Quote:

The courseis aimed atparents atcarers who care full time for children

Presumably if your'e a working parent you're doing a better job ( and yes I'm joking before anybody takes the huff

)

Margaret Pilkington · 12-09-2008, 20:19

I think there are a lot of parents who give children material things but not much of their time....mostly because they are working and have little time to spare.
Children, in the main, benefit from activites that are undertaken as a family....this is one of the things that brings true closeness....children being made to feel that they are important.
But maybe my ideas are old fashioned and out moded...after all...what do I know it is 40 years since I did my parenting.....and I didn't feel like i was any good at it.

West Ender · 12-09-2008, 20:23

Quote:

Originally Posted by lancsdave

I know kids grow up quicker these days but does childhood end at 8 or do they become a lost cause if not trained by then

Well, there is the old saying of the Jesuits -
"Give me the child until 7 years of age and I will give you the man."

I believe there's a lot of truth in that. Children learn more in their first few years of life than they ever will afterwards. That's the impressionable age when they learn language, behaviour, tastes, their natural intelligence is either promoted or devalued and their impression of the world and the way it reacts to them, and they to it, becomes fixed.

There are a few who aren't pointed the right way as infants and still manage, somehow, to turn out really well but they are the minority. Most of the little ones who are "dragged up" by dreadful, clueless parents grow up to be dreadful and clueless themselves.

Lilly · 12-09-2008, 20:23

Quote:

Originally Posted by lancsdave

I know kids grow up quicker these days but does childhood end at 8 or do they become a lost cause if not trained by then

It seems to be badly worded )

Have you not heard the saying...'Give me a child until he is 7 and I shall give you the man' ?

There's the answer.

Margaret Pilkington · 12-09-2008, 20:28

West Ender, you are so right.
We depend very much for our own parenting skills on that which we experienced while growing up....and our parenting styles will closely mimic the one our parents used(in the main).......so children who had parents with few of these skills will have less ability to deal with the problems of parenting.

lancsdave · 12-09-2008, 20:37

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lilly

Have you not heard the saying...'Give me a child until he is 7 and I shall give you the man' ?

There's the answer.

My daughter will be well pleased at that prospect

I have 2 older stpechildren from a previous relationship. At 8 years old they were 2 of the most well behaved and polite children you could wish for. At 11 they went to secondary school, that put the Jesuit theory in to the trash bin I'm afraid

emamum · 12-09-2008, 20:40

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lilly

Have you not heard the saying...'Give me a child until he is 7 and I shall give you the man' ?

There's the answer.

SOLD!! when are you picking him up

Lilly · 12-09-2008, 20:45

Quote:

Originally Posted by emamum23

SOLD!! when are you picking him up

Hahaha...I think they need to be with someone from birth to 7 to form a character based on the parenting they've received so it's too late for your son. What's done is done.

Caz · 12-09-2008, 20:56

"Give me a child until he is 7 and I shall give you the man"
Yes we've all heard this. Maybe there is some truth in it. But that still depends on their upbringing.
How are the children from the programme that used that saying doing these days? Would be interesting to know. We must be due another update soon. Are we saying that we can't change a child after this?

Why just till 8?
Can vouch from having 6 kids meself, all of whom have been through the teenage years, the worst is yet to come, lol!

If you haven't got it in you, to be a decent parent, or ask for help if you are struggling, which comes naturally, I would say, if you want the best for your kids. Then, maybe, you would need help with these skills. But would this kind of parent ask for, or even want the help, as they are often much more concerned usually with themselves than their kids?

Agree to some extent with what Margaret P says about mimicking our own parents parenting skills, this is often the case for the worse, things going from bad to worse through generations of a family. these cases i would say cause a lot of problems in todays society. But not all of us whos own parents parenting skills leave a lot to be desired do this, they tend to go to the other extreme, wanting to make sure their kids have a better upbringing than they them selves got.

emamum · 12-09-2008, 20:56

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lilly

Hahaha...I think they need to be with someone from birth to 7 to form a character based on the parenting they've received so it's too late for your son. What's done is done.

no problem..... i will see you in march then

mrskitty · 13-09-2008, 07:36

Its not just aimed at bad parents though-its for any parent/guardian........

Margaret Pilkington · 13-09-2008, 08:17

Misskitty, I take your point, but I am of the opinion(like others on here) that the parents who need these skills will not recognise their need, and the parents who do take up the places will be the parents who DON'T really need the skill......the fact that they have come forward indicates that they have some sense of inadequacy.....which if most parents are honest, they feel, at times.

Another point I have been mulling over, is that, to be truly effective you would have to have a group of parents with varying parenting skills......this would be so that parents could all contribute something, and feel integrated into the group...... a group of all good parents, or all bad parents would probably learn nothing of any use from each other......but then maybe this is where the Social Worker comes in.

No......I'm sorry, if I were a modern day parent I would not avail myself of this 'service'.

Neil · 13-09-2008, 08:49

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lilly

Hahaha...I think they need to be with someone from birth to 7 to form a character based on the parenting they've received

I also think the child's character is based on that of the parents. I am sorry but "do as I say not do as I do" does not work with kids.

Just have at look at some of the parents you see pushing the prams around town

jaysay · 13-09-2008, 09:17

If parents start of as they mean to go on, as soon as their kids are born, then there maybe a chance of these kids being brought up right, its no use tying to insill values when a child gets to five or six, it has to start from square one, the first few years are the most important, afer that its a downward slope