Pointless products.

Acrylic-bob · 29-11-2005, 20:48

I was a little bemused earlier today to see that JML, the crap tele marketing company are offering to sell viewers of ITV a set of pens, one of which is a fountain pen which you may use to poke holes in coke cans with, should you ever feel the need.

Also included in this 'must have' offer is one of those biro's which writes in two different colours. These have been around since....well, as long as I can remember. I recall having several of them as a child.

The thing that bemused me was, who uses multicoloured biro's? How often, when writing a thank-you letter to a maiden aunt, are you seized with the irresistable urge to switch nibs and include a passage in red ink?

More to the point, who makes the bloody things?

Perhaps you can think of an even more pointless product, though I doubt it.

Doug · 29-11-2005, 20:51

HBC manifestos?

Acrylic-bob · 29-11-2005, 21:00

That is a service, or so we are told, and doesn't really count, but I do take your point. Unless you went on to describe HBC as the product of a sick and probably dangerously deranged imagination.

andrewb · 29-11-2005, 21:00

Toilet paper.

West Ender · 29-11-2005, 21:02

I've always wondered about those dog whistles that only dogs can hear and are inaudible to humans. If your dog won't come back for an ordinary whistle it won't come back for one of those either and, if it doesn't, how do you know if the thing's working anyway?

Less · 29-11-2005, 21:27

A Phoneless cord?

ASolar powered Torch?
A Takes your form mattress designed for the space programme? If you weight less in space how can it form to your shape?

N.B. It's not just pens that have different colours!

Swinny1974 · 29-11-2005, 21:30

Quote:

Originally Posted by West Ender

I've always wondered about those dog whistles that only dogs can hear and are inaudible to humans. If your dog won't come back for an ordinary whistle it won't come back for one of those either and, if it doesn't, how do you know if the thing's working anyway?

I agree they seem dodgy, whistle factorys prob just sell broken whistles as dog whistles.

chav1 · 29-11-2005, 21:34

mcdonalds

if they cant have your order ready in less than 2 mins how can they seriously call it fast food

recycled toilet paper

sorry i prefer to be a first time user

ready pasted wall paper

yeah like anyone has had not to make their own paste to make sure it sticks to the wall

junetta · 29-11-2005, 22:59

I reckon that the most useless thing in my house, apart from the kitchen, which I hate, is the top of that stupid Bedlam Cube. It is ever going to go back on top of the box? I very much doubt it!

chav1 · 29-11-2005, 23:10

those magic 8 ball things that say yes , no , maybe when you shake it to get an answer when you cant make your mind up

when asked should i hit myself in the nuts with a hammer this so called guru of information always said yes it was a good idea

not on 1 occasion was hitting myself in the balls with a hammer a good idea and therefore proves this item to be inaccurate and a pointless invention

garinda · 29-11-2005, 23:51

When I was a teenager, before naff presents became almost fashionable, and the Sunday papers come with free catalogues of the stuff, I was given an electric egg whisk.

Sounds quite good for the lazy cook?

Well it was basically an electronic needle, that went inside the egg shell before you broke it. It came with it's own mains adapter, and had two settings, one for scrabbled eggs and one for omlettes.

It didn't get much use, infact if I can find it I might stick it in the for sale thread.

Doug · 29-11-2005, 23:54

Quote:

Originally Posted by garinda

It didn't get much use, infact if I can find it I might stick it in the for sale thread.

Now that would be pointless......

garinda · 30-11-2005, 00:03

Quote:

Originally Posted by Doug

Now that would be pointless......

No, I only used it twice. The point is still quite sharp.

Doug · 30-11-2005, 00:08

Why do I get an image of Edwina Curry?

slinky · 30-11-2005, 00:15

What about those rat deterants. A little on the same line a s a dog whistle that no-one else can hear, but, this thing plugs into the plug hole and apperently rats wont go near it, because it sends out a high pitched sound that will blow there brains up!!!!!!!!!!!

YEAH YEAH WHAT EVA!!!!!!!!!! You can;t hear it!! there for it don't do anything is my opinion.

I am going to market a device. It is a air freshener, you cant smell it, but your bloody dog can, makes the home a nicer place for the pooch to live in. Now ask your dog if he can smell it??