Alcohol/Canal

[jaysay]

Originally Posted by DaveinGermany

Agreed, but it does you good to have a wonder now & then, just think were we'd be if someone hadn't wondered, what happens when I do this while doing that ? Probably somewhere mentioned in the Darwins back catalogues.

And anyway, if you read carefully it's kinda relevant as we were referring to setting up a nerve centre (admittedly in a Pub & all that entails) to collate all the incoming data, info & intelligence (????? ) being generated on the subject matter.

Then that Heth came along & well, total disruption to the programme !

Dave heth is a woman and thats what women do

[DaveinGermany]

Originally Posted by jaysay

Dave heth is a woman and thats what women do

Very brave or very foolish, haven't quite decided just yet. You might want to get yourself one of these

[DaveinGermany]

Eric for your perusal & those who may also be interested, some of Dr. B.Loxs fine works, which I managed to unearth from my vast library of tatty paperbacks, Gentlemans browsing material & back issues of Guns & Ammo.

In answer to Erics question in post 279, the good Doctor as previously mentioned produced a dissertation on the youth & society of the time (late 90’s) entitled “Saturday night & sheetfaced” & from this we can ascertain various conclusions

Adolescentis Hornius (Randy teen) usually male, will stoop to any lengths to in the vernacular of the period “Cop a feel” or “Get his end away” even resorting to Alcohol, deception & outright lies as a means to this end. Usually found in groups, skulking away doing something illicit awaiting whatever opportunities may arise. There will be a hierarchy within the “gang” but this will be dependent on social status, background & who’s the hardest or the gangs geek.

Slutus Inebriatus (Local Bike) although this appellation is somewhat misrepresentative of the young female in question, she with her friends will no doubt experiment with Alcohol & sexuality in all probably at the same time (or at least that is the conception of A.H) therefore making her fair game, should this not be the case A.H. will have no qualms about trying it on with one of her best mates. (so, from this perspective the epithet Slutus, sits more so with the male as the female of the species)

Should our young mattress matador receive the proverbial swift kick in the nads (either figuratively or eye wateringly for real) apart from being in his own little world of nadular agony, he will simply walk/ hobble back to his mates with empty boasts or proclamations of the denying females sexual orientation. To wit, the comments will run along the typical vein of “No chance there, she’s a proper Lezzer ! And she’s right ugly anyway ! Come on let’s go beat something up !”


Hopefully these chapters taken from Prof. B.Loxs Masters in - I.D.K.S. - N.R.I.D.K.S. - I.R.A.T.B. rather perceptive & timely discourse should help answer some of the questions raised by Mr.Eric of Canada

And what has it to do with the canal of this thread ? I refer you to the unsightly creature “Phallus Coverus” also mentioned by Mr.Eric of Canada oft times found floating in said canal.

Phallus Coverus (Gentlemans Jerkin/Love glove/Salami sling) an inert parasitic creature, lives a secretive life tucked away in a darkened & preferably locked drawer, other locations include crumpled up in the folds of a wallet, or the terrifying recesses & mystical depths of a Handbag. Parasitic in that it requires a host (even better when it’s two hosts) to bring about it’s latent excitability, the life span is very short (minutes if you’re lucky) but extremely intense, after this brief explosive burst of life the Salami sling will slip away into the ignominy of the lavvy/cut/bushes.

(excerpt from “Saturday night & sheetfaced” by Prof B.Loxs blah de blah de blah)

[Eric]

Originally Posted by DaveinGermany

Eric for your perusal & those who may also be interested, some of Dr. B.Loxs fine works, which I managed to unearth from my vast library of tatty paperbacks, Gentlemans browsing material & back issues of Guns & Ammo.

In answer to Erics question in post 279, the good Doctor as previously mentioned produced a dissertation on the youth & society of the time (late 90’s) entitled “Saturday night & sheetfaced” & from this we can ascertain various conclusions

Adolescentis Hornius (Randy teen) usually male, will stoop to any lengths to in the vernacular of the period “Cop a feel” or “Get his end away” even resorting to Alcohol, deception & outright lies as a means to this end. Usually found in groups, skulking away doing something illicit awaiting whatever opportunities may arise. There will be a hierarchy within the “gang” but this will be dependent on social status, background & who’s the hardest or the gangs geek.

Slutus Inebriatus (Local Bike) although this appellation is somewhat misrepresentative of the young female in question, she with her friends will no doubt experiment with Alcohol & sexuality in all probably at the same time (or at least that is the conception of A.H) therefore making her fair game, should this not be the case A.H. will have no qualms about trying it on with one of her best mates. (so, from this perspective the epithet Slutus, sits more so with the male as the female of the species)

Should our young mattress matador receive the proverbial swift kick in the nads (either figuratively or eye wateringly for real) apart from being in his own little world of nadular agony, he will simply walk/ hobble back to his mates with empty boasts or proclamations of the denying females sexual orientation. To wit, the comments will run along the typical vein of “No chance there, she’s a proper Lezzer ! And she’s right ugly anyway ! Come on let’s go beat something up !”


Hopefully these chapters taken from Prof. B.Loxs Masters in - I.D.K.S. - N.R.I.D.K.S. - I.R.A.T.B. rather perceptive & timely discourse should help answer some of the questions raised by Mr.Eric of Canada

And what has it to do with the canal of this thread ? I refer you to the unsightly creature “Phallus Coverus” also mentioned by Mr.Eric of Canada oft times found floating in said canal.

Phallus Coverus (Gentlemans Jerkin/Love glove/Salami sling) an inert parasitic creature, lives a secretive life tucked away in a darkened & preferably locked drawer, other locations include crumpled up in the folds of a wallet, or the terrifying recesses & mystical depths of a Handbag. Parasitic in that it requires a host (even better when it’s two hosts) to bring about it’s latent excitability, the life span is very short (minutes if you’re lucky) but extremely intense, after this brief explosive burst of life the Salami sling will slip away into the ignominy of the lavvy/cut/bushes.

(excerpt from “Saturday night & sheetfaced” by Prof B.Loxs blah de blah de blah)

Finally, we can get back to some serious discussion. What are Professor Loxs views on the metamorphic qualities of slutus inebriatus? It's ability to transform itself from a state of chickus super-hottus to a form known as porcus ditchus in a matter of a few short hours. One of nature's greatest mysteries!

I have been unable to get a hold of "Saturday night & sheetfaced" ... but I do know that Dr. Unken Asshollen (the famous Finnish sociologist and parrot whisperer) holds it in high regard. It is mentioned and quoted in his two papers: "Trashed in Todmorden" and "Plastered in Padiham". I also look forward, as should we all, to his upcoming "Hammered in Hynburn" published by The Railway Clique Press.

[susie123]

Originally Posted by Eric

Finally, we can get back to some serious discussion. What are Professor Loxs views on the metamorphic qualities of slutus inebriatus? It's ability to transform itself from a state of chickus super-hottus to a form known as porcus ditchus in a matter of a few short hours. One of nature's greatest mysteries!

Something to do with beer goggles innit?

[DaveinGermany]

I shall endeavour to find some gemlet of the fine Doctors work into the subject for you Eric, I do believe it was a later study of his also "R" my thanks to you for your interest in this topic (although I'm uncertain of exactly who you are )

[MargaretR]

Were you inspired by the Monty Python 'Biggus Dickus' sketch?
...or is this how boys usually 'talk dirty' ....using pig latin?

[Eric]

Originally Posted by MargaretR

Were you inspired by the Monty Python 'Biggus Dickus' sketch?
...or is this how boys usually 'talk dirty' ....using pig latin?

Our inspiration is our thirst for knowledge ... ok, and beer

[DaveinGermany]

Originally Posted by MargaretR

Were you inspired by the Monty Python 'Biggus Dickus' sketch?
...or is this how boys usually 'talk dirty' ....using pig latin?

No, no Monty here, perhaps some motley though & as to boys I suppose compared to yourself & your advanced years of experience, we are mere youngsters & deserving of the name.

As to the Pig thing, there's an expression used by some folk "Everything but the squeal", I would suggest that now we are also recycling that squeal, see no waste.

[DaveinGermany]

Originally Posted by Eric

Our inspiration is our thirst for knowledge ... ok, and beer

Cheers, my Scholarly companion of the net (or should that be Skol ?)

[Eric]

Originally Posted by DaveinGermany

Cheers, my Scholarly companion of the net (or should that be Skol ?)

Salut to you too

And it's Satruday night; so, as Mahler wrote in "Der Trinker im Fruhling" ... and it's certainly Fruhling here right now; though there is snow forecast for monday ... "Last mich betrunken sein"!

We should start a clik/klik/clique etc. called "Fellowship of the Hat" ... only folks who've been there can join

By the way, I do believe that Dr. Loxs did some research in The Hat. That was after he did a stint at the Univeristy of Tuktoyaktuk ... Go Tuk U

[Eric]

Originally Posted by DaveinGermany

No, no Monty here, perhaps some motley though & as to boys I suppose compared to yourself & your advanced years of experience, we are mere youngsters & deserving of the name.

As to the Pig thing, there's an expression used by some folk "Everything but the squeal", I would suggest that now we are also recycling that squeal, see no waste.

Something tells me I'm going to scratch pork wieners off my shopping list

[jaysay]

Originally Posted by DaveinGermany

Very brave or very foolish, haven't quite decided just yet. You might want to get yourself one of these

Na Dave I'll be okay, heth won't be on here for a day or two, so she won't see it

[DaveinGermany]

Originally Posted by Eric

We should start a clik/klik/clique etc. called "Fellowship of the Hat" ... only folks who've been there can join

Ah, the very idea, our motto "If you've not been in the bin, you're not getting in !"

note to mods, it loosely equates to this thread, there's a river & most definitely Alcohol plays a major part.

[davemac]

I'm away for two minutes and the thread descends into barmpot, lets get this back on target.

It appears that the extinguisher is poised for movement again.

It has positioned itself ready to catch the wake of a turbulent passing, as you will see from the photos it is using the ducks and ducklings to move closer to the bridge and passing barges are helping the positioning.