An easy way to commit suicide...lol

Busman747 · 30-01-2005, 00:15

As Your Wife Gets Older, Be Patient With Her

"It is important for men to remember that as women grow older it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as they did when they were younger. When men notice this, they should try not to yell. Let me relate how I handle the situation.

When I got laid off from my consulting job and took "early retirement" in April, it became necessary for Willow to get a full-time job, both for extra income and for health benefits that we need. It was shortly after she started working that I noticed that she was beginning to show her age.

I usually get home from fishing or hunting about the same time she gets home from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says that she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts supper. I try not to yell, instead I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she finally does get supper on the table.

She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. It is now not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after supper. I do what I can by reminding her several times each evening that they aren't cleaning themselves. I know she appreciates this, as it does seem to help her get them done before she goes to bed.

Now that she is older she seems to get tired so much more quickly. Our washer and dryer are in the basement. Sometimes she says she just can't make another trip down those steps. I don't make a big issue of this. As long as she finishes up the laundry the next evening I am willing to overlook it. Not only that, but unless I need something ironed to wear to the Monday Accy web meeting or to Wednesday's or Saturday's poker club or to Tuesday's or Thursday's bowling or something like that, I will tell her to wait until the next evening to do the ironing. This gives her little more time to do some of those odds and ends things like shampooing the cat, vacuuming or dusting.

Also, if I have had a really good day fishing, this allows her to gut and scale the fish at a more leisurely pace. Willow is starting to complain a little occasionally. For example, she will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. In spite of her complaining, I continue to try to offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any, if you know what I mean.

When doing simple jobs she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the yard. I try not to embarrass her when she needs these little extra rest breaks. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while. I tell her that as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me and take her break by the hammock so she can talk with me until I fall asleep.

I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Willow on a daily basis. I'm not saying that the ability to show this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible.

No one knows better than I do how frustrating women can become as they get older. However, guys, even if you just yell at your wife a little less often because of this article, I will consider that writing it was worthwhile."

Signed,
Busman.

(NB: Busman’s funeral was on Saturday, January 25th.
Willow was acquitted Monday, January, 27th.)

Margaret Pilkington · 30-01-2005, 14:35

BH....... Busman, you are really cruisin' for a bruisin' there. I hope you soon get used to walking on crutches and eating hospital grub!......Oh and I don't think you should expect any flowers unless it is a wreath of lilies for the funeral!

WillowTheWhisp · 30-01-2005, 14:40

.....................

Margaret Pilkington · 30-01-2005, 14:49

Willow..... I have a nice bed bat if you want to borrow it! Your hand isn't hard enough!

WillowTheWhisp · 30-01-2005, 14:51

What's a bed bat? Is it like a rug beater?

Busman747 · 30-01-2005, 14:56

Thank you for your sympathy Margaret, Willow does not need a bed bat, that slap really hurt ....but I just had to do it

Margaret Pilkington · 30-01-2005, 14:57

Willow... you surprise me..... it is like a baseball bat, but you take it to bed with you and when the ol' feller thinks about getting a bit intimate.....you cool his ardour with the bed bat. it is a very effective form of contraception!

Margaret Pilkington · 30-01-2005, 14:58

Busman... you deserve it..... it is a good job I can't reach you too!

WillowTheWhisp · 30-01-2005, 14:59

ooer ...................

Margaret Pilkington · 30-01-2005, 15:00

Yeah Willow...... that's what he would be saying! with perhaps an added OUCH!

Margaret Pilkington · 30-01-2005, 15:12

And I've just seen that you are going to marry him....well congratulations to both of you! I hope you will be very happy......well, if he lives that long, I mean!

janet · 30-01-2005, 15:45

If i did'nt know you busman i would have to call you a M C Pig.lol
i'm sure willow will find a way to get back at you, cant wait to see what she has in store.

WillowTheWhisp · 30-01-2005, 15:57

Quote:

Originally Posted by Busman747

(NB: Busman’s funeral was on Saturday, January 25th.
Willow was acquitted Monday, January, 27th.)

There wasn't a Saturday January 25th this year and Busman hasn't retired yet and we aren't even married yet so is this some kind of awful premonition of the future?

lettie · 30-01-2005, 16:13

Hehehehe... I know someone with that kind of attitude Busman but luckily I divorced him.

I had to divorce him, I couldn't find anyone brave enough to give me an alibi..

Sparkologist · 30-01-2005, 17:33

I guess I'd better be careful what I say and do then, Lettie.