Car Dealers What They Really Mean

Less · 23-06-2009, 04:37

Was listening to my favourite radio prog' and he asked for examples of what car dealers really mean when they try to sell you a motor, below are some I sent in.

What others can we come up with?

Side Impact bars as standard A necessary safety feature as this model drifts severely to the right if you apply too much pressure to the brakes.

Free AA membership (other companies are available), we had to buy the membership otherwise their inspector wouldn't have passed the car as fit.

Interest Free If you are stupid enough to ruin your credit rating by using this credit company, don't come running to us, we aren't interested, I'll tell you that for free.

Tow Bar Fitted Engine, clutch & gear box could do with replacing, well what do you expect? The last owner shouldn't have tried towing such a large caravan with an 1100 cc car!

In-car entertainment centre The kids will have hours of fun listening to mum and dad arguing at the front because we haven't been able to remove the xxx rated porno DVD from the player so it will be permanently OFF!

Sports Rated Tyres If these things had any less tread they would be used in a Grande Prix.

Practical runner It works but your neigbours will be sniggering when you first drive it onto the street.

Classic It is so old you will never be able to use it as it will be in the garage most of the time getting all the expensive bits changed.

One old lady owner she only used it for going to Church Joan of arc had a few problems with the heater but we've got all the half burnt faggots out of the fan now.

accyman · 23-06-2009, 10:46

good runner - you will be spendin a lot of time pushing it , buy some trainers

1 carefull owner - but their son drove it liek a rally car

it flew through its MOT - was done as a back hander very quickly while the boss was at lunch

teh car is spacious and accomodating - has spent time on dogging sites so expect to get pipped at by strangers waving at you

is equipped with hands free - the steering wheel occasionaly falls off

semi automatic - teh clutch is buggered

child friendly - you can reach teh kids with a fly swatter from the drivers seat

docking station for satnav - passenger seat for the wife