Embarrassing first date.

Sparkologist · 29-11-2004, 19:01

Ooh Lordy!

This was on the "Tonight Show" with Jay Leno. Jay went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The winner described her worst first date experience.

There is absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!
She said it was midwinter... snowing and quite cold... and the guy had taken her skiing to Lake Arrowhead. It was a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers, after all, and truly had never met before. The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that afternoon. They were driving back down the mountain, when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra latte. They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the middle of nowhere!
Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did for awhile. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going, there came a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her pee beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his car.
They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants down and started. Unfortunately, in the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself. Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking.
All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation. Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation. As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender.
Thoughts of tongues frozen to pump handles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem due to the extreme cold. Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humour she answered her date's concerns about "what is taking so long" with a reply that indeed, she was "freezing her butt off and in need of some assistance"!
He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing. She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma.
Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a real problem. Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free.
So, as she looked the other way, her first-time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender.
As for the Tonight Show... she took the prize hands down... Or perhaps that should be "pants down."

And you thought your first date was embarrassing.

Jay Leno's comment - - - - This gives a whole new meaning to being "p*ssed off".

vorlon24 · 29-11-2004, 19:12

And I thought dropping the contents of my egg sandwich down my front was embarrassing!!!

Less · 29-11-2004, 20:29

Imagine yourself to be 16 & 1/2 to 17 years of age, you finally plucked up the courage to ask the girl you'd seen at the disco for a dance, joy of joys not only does she say yes, but, she has been waiting months for you to ask her. WOW! then she says after a few mummbled words from you that she would love for you to walk her home. You get her to her gate wonder if you would be too forward if you gave her a kiss, & she invites you in for a coffee. In the house you find that her parents have already gone to bed, (YES I'VE FINALLY DIED AND GONE TO HEAVEN!), You're both on the settee having a hello type snog when you spy the family cat licking the fur on it's back just tidying up.

You, can't think of anything to say so grasping at straws you say, Don't you wish you could do what the cat is doing? i.e. able to scratch it's back with it's tongue. By the time she turns round the cat has changed places & is now licking between it's hind- legs Now for 1,000 Royski type notes how many of the three steps in front of her house did she bounce me off on the way out?

sarnie boy · 29-11-2004, 20:33

very scary did that happen to Less

Less · 29-11-2004, 20:38

Quote:

Originally Posted by sarnie boy

very scary did that happen to Less

If it's scary it must have happened to Less, what happens in Silence of the Lambs is like a quiet week-end for me compared with real life!

Len · 29-11-2004, 21:23

Something once happened to me .It was my very first date and hers also (bless her).
I nervously asked her out and she said yes. So we arranged that I would pick her up from her home about 7.30.
7.30 arrived, so did I, but she wasn’t quite ready so I was invited it to her home while she finished off getting ready.
I then ended up sitting in the living room waiting with her mum and dad; me on the settee and her parents sat on the other two chairs.
They had a little dog, just not sure what make it where. “But Christ!” the little sod. As soon as I walked into the living room their little dog was running round very excited. Anyhow I said hello to every one and sat down and started to watch the TV like everyone else.
The next thing that happens is the dog disappears behind one of the chairs and reappears carrying a slipper, now the dog wasn’t much bigger than the slipper but it plonked its self and the slipper right in front of the TV. Then it proceeded to give the slipper one! Right in front of her parents and myself and all the time the dog kept looking at me with a silly grin. I could have died, I am sure that the dog new what the crack was. lol I glanced at her parents and their eyes where pinned to the TV screen pretending that this wasn’t happening, I was so embarrassed. At that moment my date turned up, so I sprung to my feet, wished her parent good night and rushed out of the house.
I remember thinking, this could only happen to me.

lettie · 30-11-2004, 08:32

The one on Jay Leno is possibly the worst first date I've ever heard of..

I wonder if they're still together. I suppose I'm lucky, the worst thing I've done on a first date is get absolutely drunk as a skunk and fall alseep in the taxi back from Manchester (ringing any bells there Sparky??)

Sparkologist · 30-11-2004, 19:30

Quote:

Originally Posted by lettie

I suppose I'm lucky, the worst thing I've done on a first date is get absolutely drunk as a skunk and fall alseep in the taxi back from Manchester (ringing any bells there Sparky??)

Was that the one where we went to see Madness at Old Trafford, and you started a ruck with the bouncers 'cos they wouldn't let you clamber onto the stage, in order to immediately dive off again, into the audience.

Was that the date where I said, "Let's get off the tram now, we can catch the bus home from the top of Deansgate," as we stood there watching the tail lights of the last bus disappearing over the horizon?
The same date where I said, "Never mind, the last train leaves for Blackburn from Victoria station soon." where 'soon' meant sooner than I expected!
The same date where the taxi cost fifty big, fat, crisp, shiny, new ones!
The same taxi where you had your head on my lap and pretended to be asleep when I said, "While you're down there, Lettie..."

Oh, that date. Yes. I remember it well!

lettie · 30-11-2004, 22:02

It might have been....

You knew we were way too hammered to ever be able to run for that bus. I think you were just looking for an excuse to fork out £50 for a taxi, so that you could utter the 'while you're down there' thingy..