1/ Decide you would like to have poached eggs for a change.
2/Use a well tested recipe for doing them in a micro-wave i.e. bung a couple of eggs in a mug cover with water then place a saucer on top. Believe me, the eggs get poached to perfection...
...normally!
3/ Press the button for 1min on full power.
4/ check after the beep to find that the eggs are only half cooked.
5/Ignore the fact that this is strange and press for another minute.
6/Rush into the kitchen when you hear a muffled explosion.
7/ switch off micro-wave and check contents.
8/ discover a saucer split in half and egg plastered in every conceivable corner of the oven.
9/ stick fingers around the bigger bits before they cool and congeal to the oven.
10/ Eat whilst still warm by sucking fingers.
11/Look at the mess and decide, today is Saturday, this mess can wait until Sunday to be cleaned up.
12/Don't forget to let everyone else know what has happened, maybe, just, maybe you will get some sympathy.
13/ (Unlucky for some), don't hold your breath, sympathy is a scarce element amongst the folk you know.