Liverpool fan

Mancie · 18-03-2010, 08:43

A primary teacher explains to her class that she is a Liverpool fan. She asks her students to raise their hands if they are Liverpool fans, everyone in the class raises their hand except one little girl.
The teacher looks at the girl with surprise and says, "Mary, why didn't you raise your hand?" "Because I'm not a Liverpool fan," she replied. the teacher, still shocked, asked, "if you are not a Liverpool fan, then who are you a fan of?" "I am a Man Utd fan and proud of it," Mary replied.
The teacher could not believe her ears..... "Mary, why are you a Man Utd fan?"...... "Because my mum is a Man Utd fan, and my dad is a Man Utd fan, so I'm a Man Utd fan" ....the teacher in an obviously annoyed tone, "that is no reason for you to be a Man Utd fan. You don't have to be just like your parents all of the time, if your Mum was a shoplifter and your Dad a drug addict what would you be then?"... Mary thought then said, "I'd be a Liverpool fan."

LYNX1 · 18-03-2010, 08:55

Just what I need first thing in the morning lmao

cashman · 18-03-2010, 08:59

class Mancie.

accyman · 18-03-2010, 09:38

a teacher asks little johnny why he is telling everyone his father is a pedophile

johnny replies saying that its less embarrasing than them knowing his father is a liverpool fan

DaveinGermany · 18-03-2010, 18:51

Go on ! Bring it on !

I've heard most of them I think, but you're missing a few

"What do you call a Scouser in a suit ?" the Accused

"What do you call a Scouser in a detatched House ?" A Robber

"Scousers only got into the Gene pool by sneaking in when the Life guard was away !"

A Scouser, An Aussie & an Irish Fella sitting at the bar, looking over into the corner they see a fella with long hair a beard & flowing robes sitting by himself nursing a Pint & a bag of Wotsits.

They get into a discussion over the stranger & decide it's definitely Jesus, so they each send him a Pint over. The Barman takes the Drinks & explains to Jesus, who looks up & nods his appreciation to the Guys at the Bar.

When he finishes all his Beers Jesus walks over to the 3 of them, he takes the hand of the Aussie & shakes it, then says " My thanks for the Fosters & your ills are healed !" The Aussie stands up & says "Strewth mate I've had a gimpy back for years & now it's just great mate, good on yer Jesus !"

He then takes Paddys hand shakes it, then says "My thanks for the Guinness & your ills are also healed !" Paddy jumps off his stool & starts jigging about "Yer a Grand man so yer are Jesus, oi've not been able to move loik dis in many a yer, ar me sweet colleen ul be singin yer praises so she will !"

He reaches for the hand of the Scouser who rapidly shoves his hands deep into his Donkey Jacket pockets, Looks up at Jesus and says " Ar ey mate, P*** off will yer, I'm on benefits !"

So anymore for anymore ???