Thoughts For The Day

[SPUGGIE J]

Getting information off the Internet is like taking
a drink from a fire hydrant.

America is a country where half the money is
spent buying food, and the other half is spent
trying to lose weight.

When you dream in color, it's a pigment of
your imagination.

Get the last word in . . . apologize.

Love will find a way. Indifference will find
an excuse.

Everybody is ignorant, just on different subjects.

Let's have lunch. I can't afford therapy.

If the world is getting smaller how come they
raised the postal rates?

We have to believe in free will. We have no
choice.

If you have twenty things to do in a day and
nineteen of them go well, which one do
you talk about over dinner?

Half the people on the road should be pulled over
by the police, the other half by psychiatrists.

The difference between FEMA and Social Security:
You might actually live long enough to get benefits
from Social Security.

Don't attempt to run from the past, it is always
behind you.

People like you are the reason people like me
need medication.

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a
cash advance.

Middle age: when a guy turns off lights for economical
rather than romantic reasons.

I think, therefore I'm single

Mother Nature has joined the insurgents.

Tankruptcy (n): The financial condition resulting
from fueling one's SUV.

Three things in life are certain. . . . taxes, death,
and data loss.