So there I was, no take away for tonight's meal I'll cook (yeah right I used the micro-wave), I made myself some scrambled eggs, that for me IS cooking!
Just to be different I added a tin of Macaroni cheese, (what the hell if you've run out of milk it's a good substitute).
Cooking away, everything smelling good did some toast, Oh well if I've got to butter it may as well put some peanut-butter on!
The dish at last is ready, ow! That dish is burning my hand I think I'll get my oven glove, Oh dear after the last time I nearly set it on fire I put it in the washing machine and it's still wet.
Having delicate skin and knowing how long burns take to heal, I did the only thing left to me, I opened a sliced loaf and used the crust, no burnt hand and because I never eat crusts I can throw it away!
O.K. I admit it I'm not as inept at cooking as I pretend, but, WHEN is one of you out there going to have sympathy and decide I could do with meals on wheels, and save me from all this effort?