bullying

[burt]

my grandaughter was getting bullied when she was at school she used to sleep at my house it went on for ages so i went to school and confronted the girl in front her friends told her to leave her alone and it worked.. maybe she needs that

[blazey]

I think there are two types of bully.

The first is the one who gets similar degrading treatment towards themselves from elsewhere and so take their pain out on another vulnerable person at school. This type of bullies parents probably isn't aware of their childs behaviour.

Then there is the one who does it simply because it gets them accepted with a certain crowd of people at school, and more often than not their parents are well aware of the sort of child their child has become, as they have encouraged it/act that way themselves.

I think parents who encourage their children to 'hit them back' should do so cautiously, because acting like the bully doesn't encessarily solve the problem, and can make some victims of bullies end up bullying others themselves, like the first type of bully, or end up like the second type of bully with the 'if you cant beat them, join them' type of attitude.

I don't think any sort of violence solves anything.

[katex]

Originally Posted by blazey

I think parents who encourage their children to 'hit them back' should do so cautiously, because acting like the bully doesn't encessarily solve the problem, and can make some victims of bullies end up bullying others themselves, like the first type of bully, or end up like the second type of bully with the 'if you cant beat them, join them' type of attitude.

I don't think any sort of violence solves anything.

I agree entirely with this Blazey .. heard many a parent tell their children to 'Hit 'em back where it hurts'. Think OK if you are in an extremely bad defensive position, but best to deal with in other ways.

My son has always been good with words and wit, and got himself out of any potential situation with this ... can't say that for daughter, although good verbally, would always strike back like a cornered rat .. just came natural like .. nobody messed with her I can tell ya.

Think I may have reacted a little like Panther (although I do have a little difficulty with causing people physical harm) and Burt initially.

Was one small situation with son, think probably in his second year, seems older lad was using his arm as a punch bag on the school coach in the mornings. Fortuitously, PE Master picked up on this and once confronted, son was not afraid to explain bruising on his arms .. situation was soon despatched I can tell ya' with bully on the mat, and letters to his parents.

He did not tell me about this until a couple of years later ... (after about 10, they will not allow you to scrub their backs in the bath ) .. by then, of course, he was a strapping 6 footer himself, towered above the bully, but am confident he never sought any sort of retribution.

[flashy]

Originally Posted by burt

my grandaughter was getting bullied when she was at school she used to sleep at my house it went on for ages so i went to school and confronted the girl in front her friends told her to leave her alone and it worked.. maybe she needs that

unfortunately it doesnt always work like that, Reece is now being bullied by 5 children at school, i'm at my witts end with it all, i am on the phone to school most days, this has been going on for months, ive actually just been to see two of the parents and they seemed to be ok with me, but we'll see, if you try and talk to the kids about it they just give you a mouthful, what do i do other than take him out of the school? Reece has 5 months left at that school and he has his s.a.t.s coming up so i dont really want to move him, he is getting to the stage where he doesnt want to go to school

[panther]

I hate bullies, it gets me mad just thinking about them!!

the sad thing is its just not in the playground, its also in the workforce too.
bullys are people who seek attention, because they arnt getting any at home, so i blame the parents, flashy if it was my kid, i would go up the wall and fang hold of the little bastards!!...sorry but i detest them sort of people, i really do!!

I hope its gets sorted

[flashy]

oh believe me panther i wanna get hold of the little sh!ts but i'd only end up inside because i just wouldnt stop if i got hold of them, i'd end up doing some damage

[howarth]

yes i dnt blame you at all nida, it deff is a hard one, i like ive said b4 im glad i got jack out ov there wen i had the chance....... but they are all little ****s, wot goes around comes around.........

[flashy]

Originally Posted by howarth

yes i dnt blame you at all nida, it deff is a hard one, i like ive said b4 im glad i got jack out ov there wen i had the chance....... but they are all little ****s, wot goes around comes around.........

and it cant come around soon enough hun

[BERNADETTE]

Bit of advice needed please. My grandson is being bullied by bigger lads at school, it started off with kids his age commentng on his burns. He stood up for himself and ended up being the one getting told off. My daughter went to see his teacher and she was saying he shouldn't retaliate but why should he put up with cruel comments. Turns out the older brother of one of these kids has been holding him while the others hit him. It has got to the stage that he is saying he isn't well to avoid going to school. As speaking to his teacher didn't help matters so am thinking of going to see the head teacher with my daughter. He really doesn't want us to go to the school but we feel somehing should be done. What would you do????

[Lilly]

Originally Posted by BERNADETTE

Bit of advice needed please. My grandson is being bullied by bigger lads at school, it started off with kids his age commentng on his burns. He stood up for himself and ended up being the one getting told off. My daughter went to see his teacher and she was saying he shouldn't retaliate but why should he put up with cruel comments. Turns out the older brother of one of these kids has been holding him while the others hit him. It has got to the stage that he is saying he isn't well to avoid going to school. As speaking to his teacher didn't help matters so am thinking of going to see the head teacher with my daughter. He really doesn't want us to go to the school but we feel somehing should be done. What would you do????

If you are not happy with the teacher's response I would make an appointment to have a chat with the head teacher.

Your grandson probably won't want you to but that's what the bullies want.

It needs stamping out, now.

[accyman]

is it the board of goveners schools have that you can goto if your not happy about somthing?

my son was getting bullied at school by a few lads calling him fat and after weeks of torment my son flattened the little punk which got him in trouble

his mother took the schools side and repremanded my son leaving him upset and frustrated because he was still getting bullied and coulnt even retaliate because he would not only get into trouble with the teachers but also with his mum

after a few weeks this situation came to my attention and i sent my son to school with instructions to thump the bully if he so much as uttered one bad word in his direction , i then rang the school and calmy explained to his head of year that my son would stop hitting this bully if the bully either learned or was told not to call him fat as i would rather see my son expelled from school than find him hanging off the end of a rope because of bullying


if your son is been held down and thumped by others i wouldnt contact the school i would contactthe police and ask for assault charges to be pressed

[cherokee]

My daughter went through a similar thing when she was at school , She were being bullied at school then when school excluded the girl she would wait for my daughter in a morning or afternoon , it got so bad that i contacted the police and with the help of the school this girl ended up being charged and told by the courts she was to stay well away from my daughter.
I never thought for one minute that it would lead to her going to court but I am so glad I went through with it .
My Daughter is now at college and still sees this girl on occasions, but even now this girls stays well away and knows I wont hesitate to take action if she goes anywhere near my daughter.

[panther]

GRRRRRR, let me at em!!.......I hate the scum!!...things like this really get me mad!...sorry but cant give sensible advice as my kids have never been bullied, what i can say if it was my kids id put the fear of god into them......then........................th__thwack__by_zacthetoad.gif

[panther]

oops just realised this is an old thread....

[emamum]

S'ok Panther, Bernie resurrected it for advice