Its Friday

Bazf · 18-03-2005, 18:14

Evil Manc Computer Viruses

Be on the lookout for a new breed of 'Evil Manc' computer viruses that could seriously affect / infect your PC.

There are many varieties of this virus, each affecting your computer in a different way. Details of each Variant of this virus are shown below.

The Manchester United Virus - This where the computer develops a memory disorder and forgets about every thing before 1993.

The Manchester United shirt virus - Designed to drain your bank account This one is especially hard to detect as it changes its format every three months.

The Rio Ferdinand virus - This affects newer computers mainly. The computer looks great, all the lights are on, but nothing works.

The Roy Keane virus - Throws you out of Windows.

The Alex Ferguson virus - The computer develops a continuous whining noise. The on screen clock runs a lot slower than all the other computers in the building.

The Wyane Rooney virus - Will take numerous attempts to get into the net often failing completely.

The Ryan Giggs virus - The computer develops a processor problem whereby it thinks it's better than it actually is. It also experiences dramatic fluctuations in performance.

The Roy Carroll virus - You just can't save anything.

The Gary Neville virus - Makes your Computer go really slow and Creates big holes in your Hard-Drive!

The Phil Neville virus - The worst of all, ruins all memory of basic functions and programmes, randomly delivering data to the wrong goal. Also weakens all communications within the network

Dressing Room virus - Appears when the system fails. Reboot may be dangerous.

John_Timmins · 18-03-2005, 21:09

sorry but how can u slag of ryan giggs he is in my opinion probably one of the best playere ever to have come out of the UK in years!!! if he was english then we would have won the world cup

I dont care who else u slag of but not Ryan Giggs!!!! He is ace and sometime carrys the whole of the united team through a game.

Liverpool fan or not u have to rate him as one of the best player ever!!!

Bazf · 19-03-2005, 00:44

Did you see the title of the post....... it's Friday, so I presume youve been out drinking and I know your one of those I like football people but do be brief fella, Ryan Giggs one of the best players to come out of the UK who you kidding. My Border Collie's got more personality then that welsh git. He was captain of England at Junior level and chose wales for full international.

Bagpuss · 19-03-2005, 22:16

Mr Timmins are you for real?
Just have a laugh as that's what Bazf's post was intended for.

John_Timmins · 20-03-2005, 13:09

oreyt yeah sorry having a blonde moment lol

zayno14 · 20-03-2005, 13:14

Ryan giggs or Riise,Nunez, Kewell, Garcia, Haman, Diao, Biscan??

RYAN GIGGS EVERYTIME!

John_Timmins · 20-03-2005, 13:15

Quote:

He was captain of England at Junior level and chose wales for full international

WRONG he did not choose

This was actually becuase the rules for england school boys is that u play for which ever team u go to school in and he went to school in england.
He has NO english connections as he has said many many times!!! he mum, dad, grandma and grandda where all welsh so he could not play for england!!!!!! therefore he could not play for england at full international.

There was also somebody else similar to this but cannot remember who it was who played for wales then at full international played for england for the same reason!!!!

Bazf · 20-03-2005, 15:35

My god we have a board full of manuer closet supporters, going have some fun with this.
(To the tune of Robin Hood)
"Ryan Giggs, Ryan Giggs missed an open goal,
Ryan Giggs, Ryan Giggs missed an open goal,
How did he miss?
Everone took the ****,
Ryan Giggs, Ryan Giggs, Ryan Giggs."

John_Timmins · 20-03-2005, 18:57

sad comes to mind

Bazf · 20-03-2005, 20:16

Whos mind?

Bend it like 'Berto
"Well done Ryan, but now you must learn how to bend it back again!" says Roberto Carlos using Dan O'Sullivan's voice.

What a winker!
Why did he miss that sitter? "Because his eyes are too close together," says Dan Ellis.

Ryan air
Andrew Tatem has another go, and unlike Giggs, he's slightly nearer the target with this effort

Chalk and fees
"Despite his performance against Juve, £20m is a lot for a 30-year-old whereas £18m is very little for a young sprite of a lad," reasons Shower of Kunst. "Allow Sir Alex to do the maths for you."

zayno14 · 21-03-2005, 14:36

sorry i was dozing off then...still going on about ryan giggs sitter against arsenal? Or are we talking about his double against liverpool last season? or are we talkin about jerzy dudek impressive keeping against manchester united in the past few seasons eg. blunder allows forlan in or maybe how blackburn have won the premiership more times than liverpool..........

John_Timmins · 21-03-2005, 16:22

sorry but u cant call liverpool either they have won that many cups and leagues its unthinkable

and i still think ryan giggs is one of my greatest player ever. put it this way would u say no to him coming to ur side? (not many sane people would)

Bazf · 22-03-2005, 13:44

Ferguson rues missed opportunity
Sir Alex Ferguson bemoaned Manchester United's finishing over the course of the two legs of their Champions League defeat to AC Milan.
United, despite a glittering array of attacking talent, failed to hit the target, Ryan Giggs coming closest when he shaved the woodwork with the goal gapping

"We didn't get the break we needed when Ryan hit the post," Ferguson added.

That was the key to the whole contest, that was the chance and unfortunately we didn't take it."

Bazf · 22-03-2005, 21:59

TWO Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly so they lit a fire in the craft.

Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

JohnW · 23-03-2005, 12:49

Quote by Bazf: The Manchester United Virus - This where the computer develops a memory disorder and forgets about every thing before 1993

I suppose it's not as bad as trying to remember everything before 1993 because there's nothing worth remembering since.