2019/20 Prediction League; Game 21 v Portsmouth FC (home)

Div3North · 12-12-2019, 12:10

Accrington Stanley

V

Portsmouth FC

2019/20 Prediction League; Game 21 v Pompeii (home)

So when, can any Stanley Historian tell me, was the last time that we reached the last 16 of a national Knock-Out tournament? “Well Done You Reds” ……………… Stanley 2 Trotters 0 – or, if you aggregate the scores, Stanley 9 Trotters1 ………….. Eat your heart out, Del Boy!

And the Stendel Scandal (very Miss Marple ….. “The Mis-Doings in Barnsley”) goes on; Barnsley want big compo (“£££££££££”) from Hearts because – the LambChops allege – Daniel spoke, without permission, to “another Championship Club” while he was still Barnsley manager. And then he accepted Hearts’ offer when he wasn’t Barnsley manager ………… and Hearts have never been in the EFL Championship …………. And their case is what? And they establish civil liability against Hearts how? If BarmyBarnsley issue proceedings against Hearts I can see a big order for wasted costs coming up!

Everton – to name just one – are looking for a new Manager, having Silva’d Marco this week; they’re not going to get Ancelotti, it was said (although they are having talks, it’s also said), they didn’t get Vitor Pereira, or Unai Emery, and they’ve two chances (slim and nil) of Eddie Howe from the Cherries or Mikel Arteta from ManCity ………. And they’re still looking, including at – well – David Moyes ……… actually, they’re interested in anybody with two legs and a pulse, but no-one seems interested in them. I think Neil Warnock’s free, Mr Kenwright? And on that theme - this week’s First Starter for Ten; on 2nd December Crawley Town MutuallyConsented with (= sacked) manager Gabriele Cioffi (who had succeeded Harry Kewell in September 2018); on 5th December they re-appointed the man who managed them in the Bananarama in 2007/08 …….. so who is That Man? And sad news of the passing of ex Villa, Man City, Norwich and West Brom Boss Ron Saunders, and also of The Bald Eagle – the amazing ex Derby, Oxford and Pompey manager, Harry’s Mate, Jim Smith …………….. RIP Ron and Jim; we’ll miss you both ……….

There were a number of “Portsmouths” before Portsmouth; Portsmouth AFC, an amateur team formed by Victorian architect Arthur Cogswell, followed by Portsmouth Town FC (whose efforts to go professional resulted in their being disbanded), and then Royal Artillery (Portsmouth) FC, who were an amateur army team (amateur team from the army, not a team from an amateur army) which was retired after a ‘professionalism’ scandal in 1899. The ProperPompey was founded on 5 April 1898 at 12 High Street, Old Portsmouth as "The Portsmouth Football and Athletic Company", with John Brickwood as chairman. Frank Brettell was Portsmouth Football Club's first manager-secretary (February 1899), having at one time been secretary-player with the St Domingo Club (aka Everton); his first Portsmouth signings were Irish goalkeeper Matt Reilly and Harry Turner, both from the recently "retired" Royal Artillery (Portsmouth) F.C. ……………….. and your second Starter for Ten is this; it’s claimed that Portsmouth AFC once had a famous British author who played in goal under the pseudonym “A C Smith” …………… who was he?

Brettell proved to be an excellent signing; with his valuable northern contacts he brought in the likes of Scottish footballer Tom Wilkie, (ex Hearts and Liverpool), Bob Blyth and Sandy Brown (both signed from Preston North End), Edward Turner, Harold Clarke and Harold Stringfellow ( Everton), and Dan Cunliffe, Tommy Cleghorn and Robert "Bobby" Marshall, all signed from Liverpool. The Club then made a tongue-in-cheek application for admission to the Southern League First Division, without the usual probationary period in the lower divisions, and stap me vitals if they weren’t accepted; they joined Division One for the 1899–1900 season; they played in salmon pink shirts with maroon collars and cuffs, white shorts and black socks and were known as “The Shrimps” (not what I’d have called them, dressed like that) and they promptly finished second (behind Spurs), winning 20 of their 28 games; in 1920/21 they became founder members of Division Three, moving the following season to Div3South

To be fair, they’ve known Good Times and Bad Times; they won the First Division title in 1949 and again in 1950; they won the FA Cup in 1938/39 (beating Wolves 4-1) and in 2007/08 (beating Cardiff 1-0, with the goal coming from Kanu) ………….. they were also runners-up three times; most recently they won League Two in 2016/17 and the EFL Trophy in 2018/19 (5-4 on pens against Slumberland after a Desmond) …………. In 2007/08 they were a PrawnSandwich Team; by 2012/13 they went through a League One winless run of 23 games, and at the end of that season they GreasyPoled to League Two, and the year after they were at one point at serious risk of BananaSkinning into the Bananarama, but survived ………….. They went back up to League One (see above) in 2017 ………….Money, money, money – which, for a club so well supported, is well avoidable, you’d think

They finished last season in fourth place, behind Lotion Town, Barnsley and Charlton, with a record of P46 W25 D13 L8, scoring 83 (best in the division) and conceding 51 (not the best in the division) for 88 points, the same as Charlton, who had a one-goal advantage in GD; if Pompey hadn’t been buggered up at home in their last game by a team that took a point off then in a half-Desmond, they’d have met Donnie; instead, because we made them drop two points, they met Slumberland over the two-legs of the semi-final, and after 180 minutes they departed said play-offs by the odd goal in one (our goal by Sean McMarmite) ………………….In the summer they shed seven, two of whom went to Bognor Regis Town (I’m with King George V – “Oh b*gger Bognor!”) and five of whom didn’t; CB Matthew Clarke joined Brighton, LB Dion Donohue went to Mansfield, RB Nathan Thompson went Posh, striker Louis Dennis went to the Orient, and Jamal Lowe signed for Wigan …………… Acquisitions included RB James Bolton from the Shrews, CB Paul Downing from Blackburn, Ipswich striker Ellis Harrison, Rotherham RMF Ryan Williams, John Marquis – who hit 61 in 134 - from Donnie, and Burton winger Marcus Harness …………

At home they’re solid – P10 W5 D5 L0 GF19 GA11; away, not so much (P8 W2 D2 L4 GF9 GA9) for an overall P18 W7 D7 L4 GF28 GA20 Pts28, and tenth place (lower than they were at any point of last season) ……………… after 7 games they had one win, three draws and three defeats and were 20th; their last 11 have given them 6 wins, four draws and just a single defeat (1-0 at the Wombles!) ………….. 22 points in their last 11 games, 3 wins in their last 4; four goalless games, 5 clean sheets, scored four once and three three times…………….. in the FA Cup they’ve done Harrogate 2-1 away and Altrincham 2-1 at home (Brett Pitman in the 94th minute), which gives them Fleetwood (away) on 4th January in Round 3; they’re in the 3rd Round of the Troffy (away at Walsall on 7th January), and out of the EFL Cup 4-0 at home to Southampton after putting out Brum and QPR in the earlier rounds without conceding a goal ……………….. 17 goals in the cups so far, in 9 games, so overall 45 goals scored in 27, or 1.667 goals per game …………… Leading League scorers are Ronan Curtis (7), Ellis Harrison (6) and John Marquis (5) ……………….. last season we drew 1-1 at theirs, and drew 1-1 at ours as well (Ihiekwe); since 2013, we’ve met 8 times in the League – 2 wins, three draws and three defeats, plus they put us out of the FA Cup in 2015; we’ve scored three goals once, so have they – all else has been 0, 1 or 2 – so no goal-fests (yet)

Their Hall of Fame includes Jimmy Dickinson (828 games), GK Alan Knight (801), Guy Whittingham, Linvoy Primus, Steve Claridge, Micky Quinn, Ron Saunders (156 goals in 259 games between 1958 and 1964), Jimmy Scoular and GK Calamity James (157 games from 2006 to 2010) …………….. famous managers cover the likes of Harry Rednapp (twice), Tony Adams, Steve Claridge, Alan Ball (twice), The Bald Eagle, Ron Tindall (Chelsea and Pompey striker) and Ian St John …………….. And do you know who wears their No 58 on his shirt?

Their record League win was 9-1 v Notts County in 1927, whereas their record defeat was 10-0 at Leicester 18 months later ………….highest scoring game was Sept 2007, when they Did It Unto Reading by 7-4; most goals scored goes to Peter Harris(194), and most in a season (42) was by Guy Burgess – no, sorry, Guy Whittingham; they paid Liverpool £11million for Peter Crouch in July 2008 (and look what happened to him!), and received £18 million from Real Madrid for Lassana Diarra in the same December

Deadline for entries is, as always, scheduled kick-off time, which is 3.00pm on Saturday 14th December (soon be Christmas), by which time we will have a New Government …………. Whether they’ll be any better than any of the last umpteen Governments I seriously doubt! Form teams are still Wycombe (13 points of the last 15), Pompey, Blackpool and Oxford (11/15), and Brizzle and Bolton (10/15) ………….. Southend and the MK Dons have 1/15, Rochdale (3/15) and Tranmere and Sunderland (4/15) …………… and Crawley’s ‘new’ old manager is John Yems (but you knew that)…………and the Portsmouth AFC ’ringer’ was said to have been Sir Arthur Conan-Doyle ………….. and shirt number 58 is worn by Nelson the Dog, the Club mascot ……………..

Good luck to everyone! ……………. Keep the Faith! ……………..And thanks for playing!