2019/20 Prediction League; Game 33 v Rotherham United (home)

Div3North · 21-02-2020, 00:27

Accrington Stanley

V

Rotherham United

2019/20 Prediction League; Game 33 v The Milletts (home)

Paul Hurst was once the manager of Grimsby, then of Shrewsbury; last season he went to Ipswich and lasted 14 games; this season he’s been at the Iron and lasted 38 games; he was sacked on 29th January, along with Chris Doig, his Assistant …………… the Beeb (“God Bless the Beeb”) ran this;

In a short statement on the club website, Hurst and Doig were thanked for their "efforts" at Scunthorpe, but no details were given about who would lead the side in Saturday's league game at Crawley.

The thing that made me laugh out loud was the quotation marks around the word “efforts” …………… And then I started thinking, if there are so many numpty managers, who stay for a week and get 12 months’ salary, why can’t I get a job as a Footie Manager …….. or Sajid Javid’s free – he could save you a bob or two? ………….. “Mr Disaster” was replaced by a Returning Russ Wilcox, who previously managed the Iron from 2013 to 2014; in his defence, on 12 April 2014 Wilcox broke the record for the longest unbeaten run at the beginning of a managerial reign, going undefeated, in total, for 28 consecutive games, helping Scunthorpe to go Up the Down Escalator of Optimism (got promoted, to you!); however, they won just two of their first eleven matches back in League One, and by October 2014 Wilcox was toast. And now The Toast has Risen from the Scorched Crumbs of Failure to have another go! Harrumph!

And you’ll doubtless know that David John Ian Dunn replaced Simon Grayson by the Seaside (on a temporary basis) on 12th Feb…………. He has previous permanent managerial experience, has David John Ian; he managed Oldham. For 107 days… from October 2015 to January 2016………. but he’s still at the Tower Circus at the moment ……………. And Stuart McCall – who also managed Scunnie (from 27th August 2018 to 24th March 2019) – is back at Bratfud for the fourth time after Gary Bowyer got the Bums’ Rush; I can feel it in my water – it’ll all end in Tears Before Bedtime!

There was a lot of rejoicing after we won our third game in a row on Saturday, giving the Gargoyles something to remember us by in the 95th minute of a 100-minute, 4-3 game! In fact, we win three in a row pretty much every season at some point; we did the Wombles, Walsall and Donnie last season, won 7 of eight in 2017/18 (TwistySpires United, Cheltenham and Portly Vale, followed by Stevenage, Swindledon, Coventrary and Crewe), Notts Co, Pompey and Colchester and then Barnet, Exeter and the Orient the season before, and so on, back over the last ten years – in fact, 2012/`3 is the only season we haven’t put three straight together ……………. But we did have one winning run which outshone all the others………. So; this week’s Starter for Ten; what’s the longest sequence of consecutive wins we’ve had in the past ten years, when was it, and who did we beat?

Rotherham, as you’ll all remember, used to be in the West Riding of Yarkshire, but it’s now in the South Yorkshire Conurbation, meaning that someone turned Yorkshire 90 degrees anti-clockwise while no-one was looking … It was founded in the very early Middle Ages, the name coming from the Old English word ’ham’ (homestead or estate), allied to the River Rother (that’s easy for you to say!), meaning therefore “Homestead on the Rother”. Apparently it established itself as a Saxon Market Town on a Roman Road (which might have needed a dispensation), but following Alan Ayckbourn’s Norman Conquest an absentee landlord acquired much of the area ……. Later owners (the De Vesci family) seldom visited the town, and didn’t even build a castle (Boo!), but they did maintain a Friday Market and a Fair, which seems Fayre Enough (Gerrit? Fayre enou….. Oh suit yourselves!) In the mid-13th Century John De Vesci and Ralph de Tili gave all their possessions in Rotherham to Rufford Abbey, which led to a period of growing wealth in the Church (not that it was exactly skint to start with) …. The monks collected tithes and Fallen Women (“Save us a blond for Saturday!”), and gained an extra Market Day on a Monday and an extended Annual Fayre (“Bearded Ladies to the left, Bearded Gents to the right!”) which went from two days to three, thus screwing the locals and having a decent p1ss-up into the bargain!

The Club, as was often the case, was created out of a Merger (as opposed to a Take Over ……….. or a Take Away ……………. Or a Take That) between Rotherham Town and Rotherham County; originally they were going to call it the Town and Country, but they thought that might get them confused with a Building Society of the same name, so they settled for “United”; they were elected to the Football League in 1925,but even in a new amber and black strip, they fared little better than the old club. The now familiar red and white was adopted around 1928 but there was no improvement in the club's fortunes: in 1931 they had to apply for re-election, but immediately after the Second World War , after adopting Arsenal-style white sleeved shirts, they finished as runners-up in Div3(N) three times in succession (47, 48 and 49) and then became champions in 1951, and had their first taste of GreasyPoleClimbing. In 1955 they reached their highest ever league position of third in the (old) Second Division, goal average (1.957 plays 1.660 plays 1.469) denying them a place in the top flight after they finished level on 54 points with champions Birmingham City and runners-up Luton Town (despite winning more games than either Brum or the Louts)

Having over the more recent years played Snakes and Ladders up and down the Leagues – incidentally, don’t ever play S & L with my older granddaughter, because she cheats, which is despicable - they GreasyPoled last season in 22nd place with a record of P46 W8 D16 L22 and a GD of -31, which gave them a meagre 40 points (4 points and a shedload of goals from safety) ………… see the last match thread for Summer Transfers, but since we last met they’ve ProperSigned Curtis Tilt from Blackpool (he’s a 6’ 4” defender, but having a tilt must be a bit of a disadvantage), dispensed with the services of Akeem Hinds (a LB now at Lincoln) and Matt Palmer (a MF at Swindon), and loaned in (or, in Curtis’s case, leaned in) Bristol Citties’ winger Hakeeb AdeolaAbiola Ayinde OO J Adelakun and Terriers’ forward Joshua Abdulai Koroma, fresh from fighting the Battle of Jericho …………..

They’ve played 31 League games (home record is P16 W8 D4 L4 GF30 GA15 and away record is P15 W9 D2 L4 GF26 GA17), giving them overall P31 W17 D6 L8 GF56 GA32 Pts 57 and the Top of the Christmas Tree first place! Of their 31 League games, Michael Ihiekwe has played 30, Daniel Barlaser has played 22+3, Michael Smith (he of the hat-trick in 2012 on loan with us) has played 22+10, and Matt Crookes has played 27+2 ……………. They departed the EFL Cup in round 2 (0-1 to the Owls), didn’t make it out of the Troffy Group stages, and triumphed over Maidenhead Utd (3-1 at theirs) and Solihull (where there are NO MOORS!) 4-3 away, before falling victim to Hull and East Riding in Round 3 (at home) ……..Leading scorers are Freddie Ladapo (11 in the league), Michael Smith (9) and Matt Crookes (also 9)

Famous managers over the years included Emlyn Walter “Crazy Horse” Hughes, Norman “Bite Yer Legs”Hunter (from BoringLeedsUnited), Ronnie “Betcha!” Moore (twice), Neil Warnock, Kenny’s Jackett and Ian Porterfield, who scored the only goal in the 1973 Cup Final (Sunderland 1 Boring Leeds 0), and at the time of his death in 2007 was the Manager of Armenia; however, he also had a unique and perhaps unwanted claim to fame, which was …… what? Their record league win is 8-0 against Oldham; record defeat is 1-11 to Bratfud; ground capacity is a palindromic 12021; highest-ever goal scorer was Gladstone Guest (no, nor have I); Most Goals in a Season title is held by Wally Ardron (no, nor him either!) with 38 in 1946/47; most appearances were – I quote – “461 league matches, 39 FA Cup matches, 621 in total” (what?) – held by Danny Williams (when he wasn’t touring the Halls singing “Moon River”, to name but one); current manager is ex player Paul Warne, whose two claims to fame appear to be that they he got them relegated last season, and that he won the FA Vase as a player with Diss Town in 1993/94; and it’s claimed that they’re called The Millers because of a Hovis Mill near the ground (on which basis Man U could be called “Greggs”, because there’s a Pie Shop not that far away from the Theatre of Dreams!)

Ref for this one is Seb Stockbridge (known to his mates as Seb Stockbridge, and to football fans everywhere as “FeckingUselessBlindShortArse”), who refereed The Millers’ 6-1 thrashing of Bolton in September (2 yellow cards), and our 2-0 ‘spicy’ win over Ipswich in October (booking 6, awarding a penalty, and sending off Midsomer Murders’ DCI Barnaby’s dog (Sykes) and the Little Twerp from Suffolk) …….. in 17 League 1 or 2 games this season he’s booked 60, awarded 10 penalties and sent off 5, including two players for ‘two yellows = one red’, two at the Wham (see “FeckingUselessBlindShortArse” above) and one Moore – sorry, one more …………..

Deadline for entries is, as always, scheduled kick-off time, which is 3.00pm on Saturday 22nd February; we met in mid-November (when the weather was a lot better than it is now), and in a Feisty Encounter they got 5 bookings and one goal, and we got three bookings and sod all else; of their last 12 games they’ve won 8, drawn 3 and lost just the one (2-1 at the Posh) ….. apart from there, they’ve also lost at Pompey (3-2), Donnie (2-1) and Brizzle (1-0), so they’re due, mathematically, to lose next time by 4-3, which just happens to be our specialist score line! Happy Days! And Ian Porterfield wouldn’t want to be remembered as the first Premier League manager to get the sack (from Chelski), even though he was; and our Bestest-Ever in the Last 10 Years Winning Run was during season 2017/18, when we won seven times on the bounce (Cambridge (1-0) Morecambe (1-0), @ Luton (2-1), Vegan Greenpeace (3-1), @Mansfield (1-0), Notts Co (1-0) and @Colchester (1-0) ………. And if I’d counted the draws, the answer would have been “unbeaten in 15”, with 13 wins 2 draws and no defeats between 3rd February and 24th April 2018) …………… and I notice you’ve all mourned That Nice Mr Westlife’s 55-day tenure at Stevenage (All together now ….. “And Another One Bites, And Another One Bites, Another One Bites The Dust”) ………….. and don’t forget Harry Gregg in your prayers – great servant to Man U, great ‘keeper, and a very special human being; Rest in Peace, Harry!

Good luck to everyone! ………..Keep the Faith! ……………Quando omni flunkus, moritati! ………….. And thanks for playing!