2021/22 Prediction League; Game 10 v Oxford United (home)

Div3North · 26-09-2021, 23:02

Accrington Stanley

v

Oxford United

2021/22 Prediction League Game 10; v Sumrith Thanakarnjanasuth's Invitation XI (home)

Statistics, as you know, don't lie. There was actually a recent survey on that very point, and 56% of those asked agreed, 38% disagreed, and 23% weren't sure ......... Against Morecambe, we had 72% of the possession against their 28%, 25 shots (9 on target) against 8 (3 on target), 7 corners against 4, and 11 players against 10 for 50+ minutes, and we drew 3-3; Oxford (against Gillingham) had 73% possession against 27%, 25 shots (7 on target) against 7 (4 on target), 12 corners against 2, and drew 1-1; in both cases, the statistics made clear who was on top; even allowing for Blind Numpty referees (and I think from his interview Coley thought we'd had one!) we (and The Mortar Boards) should have had the 3 points .....

And if you look at the Ligue Un table, the teams with either 6, 5 or 4 wins occupy the top 7 places, and the teams with 1 or 2 wins occupy the bottom 7 places; interesting that we've won 4 (more than 17 of the other teams) but lost 4 (only Donnie (6), Crewe, Charlton and the Long-nosed Pointy Things (5 each) have lost more than we have); going in to the game we were 11th, on 12 points; now we're 7th, on 13 points ......... 8 teams all have 12 points (Wombles in 8th to Burton in 15th) and two more have 11 ............ Pompey (10th) haven't won in their last 5 games (2 points), and Burton (15th) and Gillingham (19th) have 3 points from their last 15 possible - even 24th placed Donnie have 4 points ........... and the bottom four still includes Ipswich, Charlton and Donnie. I think it's probably the VG of Football! ....... Mwwwwahahahahaha!

And I don't know if you saw, but following Lady Referees in the EFL, Saturday was the first time a Rugby Premiership League game was ref'd by a Lady Referee .... she's called Sara Cox, and used to be on the TV and radio doing the Radio One shows and Strictly 2, I think, so must have had a career change ..... she took charge of Harlequins v Worcester (Quins won 35-29), and from the report I read she was a tough cookie - sending one player to the sin bin for 10 minutes for an aerial challenge, putting two on the Naughty Step for 5 minutes each to think about their behaviour, sending one to bed without his tea, and giving three smacked bottoms for fighting .......... Good on her, I say!

And this week's Starter for Ten; you all know (Woolwich) Arsenal; but who are FC Arsenal Tula, and where do they play?

Oxford, eh? The place that's (conveniently) home to the University of Oxford, the oldest university in the English-speaking world, and which has buildings in every style of English architecture from late Anglo-Saxon. Its industries include motor manufacturing, education, publishing, information technology and science. Dreamy spires, punting on the Cam (some of them aren't very good at Geography), cricket on the Village Green, and generally living the idyllic and privileged student life ....... but it wasn't always so - ask the inhabitants of the place back in 1355

The St Scholastica Day riot took place in Oxford on 10 February 1355, which is Saint Scholastica's Day; Saint Scholastica herself is the patron saint of Benedictine nuns, education, and convulsive children, and is invoked against storms and rain. The disturbance in question apparently began when two students from the University complained about the quality of wine served to them in the appropriately named Swindlestock Tavern, which stood in the centre of the town. The students quarrelled with the tavern owner; the argument quickly escalated to blows. The inn's customers joined in on both sides, and the resulting melee turned into a riot. The violence started by the bar brawl continued over three days, with armed gangs coming in from the countryside to assist the townspeople. Around 30 townsfolk were killed, as were up to 63 members of the university, and - little known fact - The University of Cambridge was established in 1209 by scholars who left Oxford following the lynching of two students there by the town's citizens.

King Edward III sent judges to the town to determine what had gone on and to advise what steps should be taken. He came down on the side of the university authorities, who were given additional powers and responsibilities to the disadvantage of the town's authorities. The town was fined 500 marks and its Mayor and Bailiffs were sent to the Marshalsea prison in London - how's that for vicarious liability?

An annual penance was also imposed on the town: each year, on St Scholastica's Day, the Mayor, Bailiffs (by now out of clink, I imagine) and sixty townspeople were compelled to attend a Mass at the University Church of St Mary the Virgin for those killed; the town was also made to pay the university a fine of one penny for each scholar killed. The practice was dropped in 1825.

On an entirely different topic, and your Second Starter for Ten; Swedish defender Adam Lindin Ljungkvist was sent off for two yellow cards playing for Pershagen SK in a ninth-tier match against Jarna SK in 2016; so far so good ............ but why will his performance that day, and especially his second yellow card, go down in the annals of Swedish football?

Nothing much new to report about the formation of Oxford United or their League history ....... elected in 1962 blah blah ..... replace Accrington Stanley blah blah ...... got to the First Division in 1985 ........... Bald Eagle blah .... won the Milk Cup in 1986, beating QPR 3-0, goals from Trevor Hebberd (who I thought was a Bishop of Somewhere), Ray Houghton and Jeremy Charles blah blah .......... GreasyPoled x 2, then eventually out of the League (coincidentally replaced by Accrington Stanley) in 2006 blah blah blah ............ Robert Maxwell ........... merger with Reading ......... won the Bananarama PlayOff final in 2010 (3-1 v York) .... promoted in 2nd place to League One in 2015/16. "Etcetera. Etcetera. Etcetera" (Yul Bryner as the King of Siam in "The King and I" - which arguably ought to be "The King and Me")

Last season saw them finish 6th on GD from Charlton with a record of P46 W22 D8 L16 GF77 GA56 and 74 points) and make the Play Offs again, losing 6-3 to Blackpool over two legs (or conceding three goals twice).... the year before they'd finished 4th in Covid Season with a PPG of 1.71, beating Pompey 5-4 on pens after two half-Desmonds, before losing 2-1 to the ChairPersons in the Final ......... in 2019/20 we drew 2-2 at ours (Clicker and Zanzala) and lost 3-0 at theirs; in 2021/22 they lost 6 of their first eight, but still managed a 4-1 win chez nous (ours by Cassidy from the 12 yard spot), although we went there later on and did them 2-1 (Nottingham and Rogers) ............ we'll settle for "bogey team", perhaps

12 left in the summer, and seven joined - three that they paid for (CM Marcus McGuane from Forest, LB Steve Seddon from Brum, and Thai-born CMF Benjamin James Davis (I wouldn't have guessed his birthplace from his name) from Fulham .... they also got LW Billy Bodin from PNE, Aussie RMF Ryan Williams from Pompey, Albanian CB Erion Zabeli from Watford, and Oldham GK Mackenzie Chapman ......... four in on loan, best known being Blackpool's Jordan Thorniley

They drew the Boat Race with Cambridge 1-1 on the opening day, and won three of four (Charlton (2-1), Crewe (1-0) and Lincoln (3-1)), losing 2-1 at Bolton ... since then, lost, draw, lost, draw (Wombles 1-2, Wycombe 0-0, Cheltenham 0-1, and Gillingham 1-1) ............ so two points and two goals in their last four games ................ record stands at P9 W3 D3 L3 GF10 GA10 Pts 12, leaving them in 13th place and behind Cambridge on Goals Scored (or, correctly, goals not scored) ........ Did Burton (away) in the EFL Cup 4-2 on pens after a half-Desmond, and then lost 2-0 at QPR; lost 4-1 at Cambridge in the first group game of the Troffy, and still have Stevenage and Spurs' Kindergarten XI to play ..........12 goals in 12 games in all; leading scorers are James Henry with 4 and Matty Taylor with 2 ....... and James Henry wasn't the American folklore legend who was a steel drivin' man on the railroad, 'cos that was John Henry

Deadline for entries is, as always, scheduled kick-off time, which is 7.45pm on Tuesday 28th September (or such other time as Chimer remembers to post a prediction) ...so far this month we've won 1 (1-0 v Shrews), drawn 1 (3-3 at the MumboJumbo Stadium), and lost two - 1-2 and 1-4; P4 W1 D1 L2 GF6 GA9 Pts4 ............ we could do with winning this one, lads

And FC Arsenal Tula - known variously as "the Red-Yellows", the Cannoneers, the Gingercakes, the Gunsmiths and the Samovars - play, these days, in the Russian Premier League; the naming is obscure, but there is at least one reference to their being a feeder club in the past; any Gooners out there who can assist? They have improved significantly over the last 10 years or so (tier 4 to tier 1), and are now in European Campaign

And Adam Lindin Ljungkvist was dismissed in the late stages of a ninth-tier game in Sweden after he let off what was apparently a rather impressive fart. Ljungkvist was sent off for "unsportsmanlike behaviour" ......... The game was almost over, and having apparently already been given a yellow card, he "released wind" and was booked for the second time. "I needed to fart, I had a bad stomach," he told the Press. "So I just farted. Then I received a yellow card and then a red"

I asked the referee: 'What, you can't fart on the field?', and he replied: 'No'.

And that's why it will go down in the annals - or do I mean anals? - of Swedish football!

And I wonder if Morecambe would like to swap us Cole Stockton for Dion Charles; what d'you think?

Good luck to everyone! ........... Keep the Faith! ........... And thanks for playing!

COYR!