Irish Joke

[West Ender]

Two men were sitting next to each other at a bar. After awhile, one guy looks at the other and says, 'I can't help but think, from listening to you, that you're from Ireland .'

The other guy responds proudly, 'Yes, I am!'

The first guy says, 'So am I! And where about from Ireland might you be'?

The other guy answers, 'I'm from Dublin.'

The first guy responds, 'So am I!'

'Sure and begorra and what street did you live on in Dublin ?

The other guy says, 'A lovely little area it was. I lived on McCleary Street in the old central part of town.'

The first guy says, 'Faith and it's a small world. So did I! So did I!
And to what school would you have been going'?

The other guy answers, 'Well now, I went to St. Mary's, of course.'

The first guy gets really excited and says, 'And so did I. Tell me, what year did you graduate'?

The other guy answers, 'Well, now, let's see. I graduated in 1964.'

The first guy exclaims, 'The Good Lord must be smiling down upon us! I can hardly believe our good luck at winding up in the same bar tonight. Can you believe it? I graduated from St. Mary's in 1964 my own self!'

About this time, Vicky walks into the bar, sits down and orders a beer.

Brian, the bartender, walks over to Vicky, shaking his head and mutters, 'It's going to be a long night tonight.'

Vicky asks, 'Why do you say that, Brian'?

'The Murphy twins are p*ssed again!

 

[katex]

That's funny .. didn't expect that punch line at all ... LOL

 

[yerself]

What's funnier is, if you told a similar joke about certain members of our community you would be branded racist. So why is it OK to make fun of some races but not others?

 

[katex]

What's funnier is, if you told a similar joke about certain members of our community you would be branded racist. So why is it OK to make fun of some races but not others?

I dunno Yerself .... maybe, because we U.K. citizens have learned to laugh at ourselves without malice or animosity ... but the 'other races' have not conquered the art yet.

I, myself, laughed, but in the same token have put up a thread re. St. Patrick's day, showing my respect and love for the Irish.

 

[West Ender]

I can only say that this joke was sent to me by my friend who got it from her husband. By the way, he's Irish.

 

[cashman]

me mam was from county dublin, learnt most of me irish jokes off her.

 

[yerself]

Paddy Vs Saddam

Saddam Hussein was sitting in his office wondering who to invade when his telephone rang.

"Hallo! Mr. Hussein," a heavily accented voice says. "This is Paddy down in County Cavan, Ireland. I am ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring war on you!!"

"Well, Paddy," Saddam replies, "This is indeed important news! Tell me, how big is your army?"

"At this moment in time," says Paddy after a moments calculation, "there is myself, my cousin Sean, my next door neighbor Gerry and the entire dominoes team from the pub -- that makes 8!"

Saddam sighs. "I must tell you Paddy that I have 1 million men in my army waiting to move on my command."

"Begorra!", says Paddy, "I'll have to ring you back!" Sure enough, the next day Paddy rings back. "Right Mr. Hussein, the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some equipment!"

"And what equipment would that be, Paddy?" Saddam asks.

"Well, we have 2 combine harvesters, a bulldozer and Murphy's tractor from the farm."

Once more Saddam sighs. "I must tell you Paddy that I have 16 thousand tanks, 14 thousand armored personnel carriers, and my army has increased to 1 and a half million since we last spoke."

"Begorra!" says Paddy "I'll have to ring you back!"

Sure enough, Paddy rings again the next day. "Right Mr. Hussein, the war is still on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne! We've modified out Ted's ultralight with a couple of rifles in the cockpit and the bridge team has joined us as well!"

Saddam is silent for a minute, then sighs. "I must tell you Paddy that I have 10 thousand bombers, 20 thousand MiG 19 attack planes, my military complex is surrounded by laser-guided surface-to-air missile sites, and since we last spoke, my army has increased to 2 million."

"Faith and begorra!", says Paddy, "I'll have to ring you back."

Sure enough, Paddy calls again the next day. "Right Mr. Hussein, I am sorry to tell you that we have had to call off the war."

"I'm sorry to hear that" says Saddam. "Why the sudden change of heart?"

"Well," says Paddy "We've all had a chat and there's no way we can feed 2 million prisoners."​