The day dawned bright and clear. It was only 9am and already it was as hot as a glass blower's backside. It was the last day of our holiday, so I decided to head off to the pool to spend the last day welded to my sunbed. Sparks wasn't ready to leave the apartment, so he said he would get washed and join me later. "No problem," said I, and off I went.
I sat on my sunbed for about an hour, reading my book and chatting to the other holiday makers that we had become friendly with. I was gasping for a drink and Sparks said that he would bring a large bottle of water with him when he came to the pool, but there was no sign of him. I was wondering if he was feeling unwell and had taken himself back to bed, when he sauntered round the corner smirking.....
"Are you alright?" I asked, concerned.
"Promise you won't laugh," he replied.
Well, that statement is like a red rag to a bull. If somebody asks you to promise not to laugh, you just know it's going to be good. I tried to keep a straight face........Honest I did, but all I managed was a nod of the head with an expression that must have resembled a grimace as I tried to control the grin that was working its way up my face.
"Don't use the knife on the back of the sink in the kitchen," said Sparks with a guilty look in his eyes.
By this time, I hardly dared ask. "Why?" I said tentatively.
"I haven't been to the loo in 3 days," was the reply.............
I knew what was coming next and I absolutely fell about laughing. No longer able to control my facial features, my sides ached and I almost lost control of my bladder.
The poor beggar had finally been to the loo, but the end result was incompatible with the Greek plumbing system and refused to budge from it's resting place in the bottom of the bowl. After 3 unsuccessful flushes and tramlines of unsightly chuffage adorning our toilet, he had to take extreme measures to get rid of it. Grabbing the nearest sharp implement..........The kitchen knife......He had proceeded to do a hatchet job on the offending Eartha Kitt, in order to reduce its gargantuan size. The toilet eventually succumbed to his efforts and with a final flush, bye bye Eartha..
He gave the knife a good wash and then boiled it in a pan that we hadn't been using (thankfully), he then laid the knife to rest at the back of the sink. To be fair, it was probably the cleanest knife in the apartment by now. He grabbed the big bottle of water and came to join me at the pool with the words "promise you won't laugh."
I laughed, on and off, all day. Although I do know of somebody else that has had to do this, I thought it was hilarious and spent the rest of the day giggling. I know that I have one sick sense of humour but thankyou Sparks for the best belly laugh of the holiday, may we have many more..........
I sat on my sunbed for about an hour, reading my book and chatting to the other holiday makers that we had become friendly with. I was gasping for a drink and Sparks said that he would bring a large bottle of water with him when he came to the pool, but there was no sign of him. I was wondering if he was feeling unwell and had taken himself back to bed, when he sauntered round the corner smirking.....
"Are you alright?" I asked, concerned.
"Promise you won't laugh," he replied.
Well, that statement is like a red rag to a bull. If somebody asks you to promise not to laugh, you just know it's going to be good. I tried to keep a straight face........Honest I did, but all I managed was a nod of the head with an expression that must have resembled a grimace as I tried to control the grin that was working its way up my face.
"Don't use the knife on the back of the sink in the kitchen," said Sparks with a guilty look in his eyes.
By this time, I hardly dared ask. "Why?" I said tentatively.
"I haven't been to the loo in 3 days," was the reply.............
I knew what was coming next and I absolutely fell about laughing. No longer able to control my facial features, my sides ached and I almost lost control of my bladder.
The poor beggar had finally been to the loo, but the end result was incompatible with the Greek plumbing system and refused to budge from it's resting place in the bottom of the bowl. After 3 unsuccessful flushes and tramlines of unsightly chuffage adorning our toilet, he had to take extreme measures to get rid of it. Grabbing the nearest sharp implement..........The kitchen knife......He had proceeded to do a hatchet job on the offending Eartha Kitt, in order to reduce its gargantuan size. The toilet eventually succumbed to his efforts and with a final flush, bye bye Eartha..
He gave the knife a good wash and then boiled it in a pan that we hadn't been using (thankfully), he then laid the knife to rest at the back of the sink. To be fair, it was probably the cleanest knife in the apartment by now. He grabbed the big bottle of water and came to join me at the pool with the words "promise you won't laugh."
I laughed, on and off, all day. Although I do know of somebody else that has had to do this, I thought it was hilarious and spent the rest of the day giggling. I know that I have one sick sense of humour but thankyou Sparks for the best belly laugh of the holiday, may we have many more..........
